Between a rock and a hard place - GaySpeak Gay Forums | Online Friends Community

Geminight · 17th April 2010

I'm in a bad way. This guy whom I have had my most serious relationship ever with (we had thought about marriage) have broken it off and not spoken to each other for about 2 years now. We met through his sister my ex-bestfriend. We have recently ran into each other again on facebook and she wants us to be friends again just like we used to "in the old days." That's all good but I really doubt my (let's call him my ex fiance) would want to see me or better yet when he sees me will probably flip the fuck out The last thing I want to do is get in another confrontation with him or put either of us through anymore pain than we have already been through. I still love him you know. But I really do want desperately to reunite with the one person who knows me possibly better than my ex fiance does. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I don't want to hurt his either! What should I do??

Genersis · 17th April 2010

You shouldn't be forced to be friends with an ex, or anyone else for that matter.
Its easier on the mind if the one you used to be in a relationship with isn't in your life, even if your fine with seeing each other again, seeing him with someone else, or him seeing you with someone else could end up hurting you both. Only if both you and him no longer have intamate feelings for each other/anger over the break up, is it safe to become friends. Unless your thinking of becoming more than friends?

I hope this helps! I, personaly haven't been in a relationship so don't take any of the above as fact, but i feel it still might have some truth to it.
Good luck!

18th April 2010

But I really do want desperately to reunite with the one person who knows me possibly better than my ex fiance does. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I don't want to hurt his either! What should I do?
Trust your feelings and tell her exactly what you are feeling.

17th April 2010	#1
Geminight Veteran Join Date: Apr 2010 Single Gay Man in Lexington (USA) Age: 22 (Starsign: Gemini) Posts: 67 View my Picture Album(s)	Between a rock and a hard place I'm in a bad way. This guy whom I have had my most serious relationship ever with (we had thought about marriage) have broken it off and not spoken to each other for about 2 years now. We met through his sister my ex-bestfriend. We have recently ran into each other again on facebook and she wants us to be friends again just like we used to "in the old days." That's all good but I really doubt my (let's call him my ex fiance) would want to see me or better yet when he sees me will probably flip the fuck out The last thing I want to do is get in another confrontation with him or put either of us through anymore pain than we have already been through. I still love him you know. But I really do want desperately to reunite with the one person who knows me possibly better than my ex fiance does. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I don't want to hurt his either! What should I do?? __________________ A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. ~Lao Tzu ~It doesn't matter, who is without a flaw~

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17th April 2010	#2
Genersis Pessimistic Optimist Join Date: May 2009 Single Gay Man in London (UK - England) Age: 21 (Starsign: Virgo) Posts: 2,199 My Mood:	You shouldn't be forced to be friends with an ex, or anyone else for that matter. Its easier on the mind if the one you used to be in a relationship with isn't in your life, even if your fine with seeing each other again, seeing him with someone else, or him seeing you with someone else could end up hurting you both. Only if both you and him no longer have intamate feelings for each other/anger over the break up, is it safe to become friends. Unless your thinking of becoming more than friends? I hope this helps! I, personaly haven't been in a relationship so don't take any of the above as fact, but i feel it still might have some truth to it. Good luck!

18th April 2010	#3
peterinmalaga Self-deleted account... Posts: n/a	But I really do want desperately to reunite with the one person who knows me possibly better than my ex fiance does. I don't want to hurt her feelings but I don't want to hurt his either! What should I do? Trust your feelings and tell her exactly what you are feeling.