|29th December 2011||#2|
King of the Word???
Join Date: Jan 2008Gay Man in a Monogamous Gay Relationship
in Near Geneva (Switzerland) (France)
Age: 54 (Starsign: Cancer)
Well, how old are you, Kikosama? Anyway, to GaySpeak. I don't think I've seen you around before.
It is quite possible that he sees a friend in you or maybe something more, a prospect of finding out more about himself, possibly. The reason why I'm asking how old you both are, is because he could be in a stage of his life where he's trying to figure things out.
For the moment, I'd just advise remaining friends with him for a little longer, and getting to know him better. If the way his friends look at you bothers you, maybe you could ask him to explain what it is that they are saying about you? Maybe they are just encouraging him to become better friends with you? Or do you think they are only there to make fun of you, as you seem different?
In any case, take care.
|29th December 2011||#3|
Join Date: Dec 2011Single Gay Man
in Southeast (USA)
Age: 37 (Starsign: Scorpio)
well man, you seem sincere...
but to help you any further than others already have, i'll need more details:
do you guys ever hang out outside of school? what do you guys talk about when you are together?
|30th December 2011||#5|
Join Date: Oct 2010Single Gay Man
in Mirkwood - Middle Earth (USA)
Gay men adopted 'flag wearing' in their back pockets. Handkerchief Code: [Only registered members can see links. ]
About a a year later straight guys started stuffing bandana's down their back pockets and hanging out - because they thought it was cool.
Gay Men adopted the goatee and 'stach look - about 18 months later straight men started growing their hairs out because they thought it was cool....
In the early 1990's Gay men started shaving their heads in support of AIDS/HIV victims - in less than a year straight guys where doing it.
Doc Martins - adopted by gay men as a way to identify themselves - in a few years everyone was wearing docs - men and women. Preppy look (Gays started it to identify themselves, soon all guys where doing it)...
Recall that very short hair cut that was died ultra-blonde... Started by gay men so gay men could identify themselves... 9 months later straight guys are doing it.
This goes way back... The pocket kerchief in the top pocket of your suit. (AKA pocket Square):
Started by Gay men in the 1890's as a way for them to flag themselves to find other gay men. By 1920 all suit ties came with a pocket square - today any man in a suit seriously considers a matching pocket square.
I believe the list of 'fashion statements' started by gay men as a way to identify themselves from the rest of the herd is extremely long. We gays are known as fashion tend setters - few straight guys get it through their thick skulls that we are wearing, doing whatever as a way to identify ourselves from the rest of the men.
The only 'fashions statement' not adopted by straight men was the pink triangle:
Of course this has a terrible history attached to it and everyone knows what it means.
The point here is that there is no way a gay man can 'flag' himself as gay to secretly let only other gay men know that he is one of them. Every attempt has failed miserably because straight guys want gay fashions (yet have no idea that these are gay signals - straight men are thick).
Unless you are a flaming nelly queen, these guy will have no idea if you are or are not gay. Unless he is a flaming nelly queen there is no way you will know if he is or isn't.
One of you are going to have to take a risk and say 'I am gay'.
I suspect you are both closeted, he hides behind dancing with girls - you hide however you hide.
Looks can say lots, but they are insufficient to convey the complex concepts we humans have, as a result we humans developed language....
DO NOT tell him your whole life history at the start. Simply tell him 'I am gay' in privacy, when no one else is around. There is no need for anything more until he signals (through language) that he too is gay and is interested in you.
Or you can wear a pink triangle to get the message across, its a safe bet no straight man will adopt that 'fashion statement'
<--- . --->
Reality is what it is - I have learned to drink my way through it...
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