Mother over for dinnner...

[Andy]

a young man called Paul invited his mother for dinner, during the course
of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how handsome Paul's
flatmate, Simon was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship
between the two, and this only made her more curious. Over the course of
the evening, while she watched the two interact, she started to wonder
if there was more between Paul and his flatmate than met the eye.
Reading his mums thoughts, Paul volunteered. "I know what you must be
thinking, but I assure you, Simon and I are just flatmates".
About a week later, Simon came to Paul saying, "Ever since your mother
came to dinner, I've been unable to find the frying pan, you don't
suppose she took it do you?" "Well I doubt it, but I'll email her just
to be sure" said Paul. So he sat down and wrote:
DEAR MOTHER, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID" TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY
HOUSE, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID NOT" TAKE THE FRYING PAN, BUT THE
FACT REMAINS THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FORDINNER,
LOVE PAUL X
Several days later, Paul received an email from his mother which read:
DEAR SON, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO" SLEEP WITH SIMON, AND I'M NOT
SAYING THAT YOU "DO NOT" SLEEP WITH SIMON, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF
HE WAS SLEEPING IN HIS OWN BED, HE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE FRYING PAN BYNOW.
LOVE MUM X
Lesson of the day, NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER
(SHE ALWAYS, ALWAYS FINDS OUT)