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Adoption or the Whole Shebang ?
#11
Lol2.

I've been working on those actually :biggrin:.

But yeah - you're absolutely right ... it does conjure up all sorts of questions actually ... like whether it's selfish to want a child of your own rather than to adopt another I guess ...

... but then again I view the desire to prolong your own bloodline to be a VERY, very longstanding one among our kind - probably almost as old as we are as a species I guess ...

!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
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#12
Dan1089 Wrote:One of my life's goals if to have a someone call me "Dad".Until very recently I thought I had my heart set on marrying someone and then have little Dans and Danielles with my DNA.But I guess my priorities have changed.There are so many children and babies in South Africa tgbt are in need of homes and it would be extremely selfish of me to just want my own kids.And again,the world is such is such a fucked up place so I don't want to bring an innocent soul here.

I don't really see what's selfish about wanting your own children. That's just a human (animal?) feeling, and it's perfectly natural. Why should YOU, Dan, adopt, while plenty of others just go ahead and produce babies, whether they want them or not?
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#13
Dan1089 Wrote:One of my life's goals if to have a someone call me "Dad".Until very recently I thought I had my heart set on marrying someone and then have little Dans and Danielles with my DNA.But I guess my priorities have changed.There are so many children and babies in South Africa tgbt are in need of homes and it would be extremely selfish of me to just want my own kids.And again,the world is such is such a fucked up place so I don't want to bring an innocent soul here.

Wow, what an amazing conversion, my mate. I totally agree.

I doubt that I would ever go so mental as to want children but I might be persuaded. The little ones really love me which is cool and all but ONE HOUR and I just wanna get out the large pot for some children stew, lol...

My sister & her hubby had the most difficult time getting preggies. He did all these tests, she took all these chemicals and still coundnt get knocked up. I kept telling them, why are you putting yourself thru hell when there are millions of children needing a good home. Sis finally saw the light. Going after a baby was very expensive and full of possible cheats. They did foster care for a couple years and finally found three children. Drugged out mother and two different fathers. Now my sis & hubby are the proud parents of one boy = 9, one girl = 7 and another girl = 11. Amazing how quickly they all became a family.

one other thing I always thought about was what if your child grew up to be an ax murderer. If it was your DNA then youre responsible but what a great excuse - He/She aint mine just adopted Laugh1
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#14
princealbertofb Wrote:I don't really see what's selfish about wanting your own children. That's just a human (animal?) feeling, and it's perfectly natural. Why should YOU, Dan, adopt, while plenty of others just go ahead and produce babies, whether they want them or not?

Another very good point ... how can one contrast the selfishness of wanting to rear one's own young against the selfishness of people that HAVE children and then DON'T care for them ...

... but then again that raises the age-old question (for women) "if you were raped, would you abort the child ?", becuase obviously it's not the child's fault that it stemmed from an act of violence and violation ...

Obviously that happens in a distinct minority of cases, but it's another question to throw into the mix I guess ...

... this is rapidly becoming a bit of a MONSTER topic !! FINALLY I have something insightful to say :biggrin:.

!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
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#15
Shadow Wrote:... but then again that raises the age-old question (for women) "if you were raped, would you abort the child ?", becuase obviously it's not the child's fault that it stemmed from an act of violence and violation ...

A monster topic, as you say. How could anyone really answer that question until or unless they experienced it? There would be all kinds of factors to consider depending on so many possible circumstances. :confused:
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#16
Okay,why do you think people really have children?I just think that the whole continuing the bloodline thing is just total tosh.I really wouldn't give a damn if I was told that all the Wade men couldn't reproduce anymore.Is it leaving your own incy wincy tiny mark on the species that is Homo sapien?I want to have children because I have so much love,caring & lessons to give,to pass on.I don't care whether I have grandkids or not either.
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#17
I also has have crazy mixed genes so therefore I'm also curious to what my children would look like.Would they have my eyes,would they have a darker/lighter skin tone,would they have curly/straight hair,would they be cute as their father,lol?I'd already picked the mother of my children,is that weird?That's another thing,come hell or water,I'd want beautiful children,stranger?
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#18
Dan1089 Wrote:Okay,why do you think people really have children? ... I want to have children because I have so much love,caring & lessons to give,to pass on.I don't care whether I have grandkids or not either.
There is nothing to compare with the feeling of holding your own child in your arms and just being utterly amazed at the whole magic process. I always wanted it, I dreamed about it as a teenager and I feel very privileged to have experienced fatherhood. One of our children was born at home and I had to be assistant midwife :eek:

Things don't usually work out the way you plan as they grow, but it is a real joy seeing how they meet the challenges they face. Sure, there are tough times (sometimes very tough ... :frown: ), but hopefully you get over those together. I would not have the energy to be a father these days. It's more fun being a grandfather. I can give grandchildren back.
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#19
Yeah - I feel the same way (which is a bit of a paradox for me) - I would love to hold my child in my arms and know that whatever he grew up to become I would have a hand in helping him to find his feet and learn of the wonders of the world, just as I had a hand in helping him to enter the world in the first place ...

... but it, like many things in life I find, is a wonderous topic to even consider, let alone embark upon ...

Dan, I think you'll find that if we were to do a survey, a fair portion of people would feel the same way as Marshlander and I - I'd guess maybe a 50/50 split ? I dunno ... but I think it'd be quite high Confusedmile:.

xx

!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
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#20
Shadow Wrote:Another very good point ... how can one contrast the selfishness of wanting to rear one's own young against the selfishness of people that HAVE children and then DON'T care for them ...

... but then again that raises the age-old question (for women) "if you were raped, would you abort the child ?", becuase obviously it's not the child's fault that it stemmed from an act of violence and violation ...

Obviously that happens in a distinct minority of cases, but it's another question to throw into the mix I guess ...

... this is rapidly becoming a bit of a MONSTER topic !! FINALLY I have something insightful to say :biggrin:.


!?!?! Shadow !?!?!
... but surely you don't intend to rape the mother?
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