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cavillr Wrote:My question is, how do other men go on with their lives seemingly nonchalant about being gay since a lot of what I said can be applied to many people? How do they deal with talking to straight men without flipping out? How do they not let their lives be consumed by this fear and anxiety?
men are amazing creatures. so attractive, so sublime, beautiful, exceptional. i love being around men, interacting with them, talking to them, getting to know them, taking care of them. i enjoy all that.
so, i don't have a reason to fear them. i want to be around them, and i love men. whether just as friends, casual encounters/acquaintances, or lovers, i love them. i have a profound deep connection with certain men, that is the best thing in life to experience.
the question is reversed, i think. why is it that you feel fear/anxiety around men?
''Do I look civilized to you?''
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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Hmm, therapy man. Get therapy.
If you can't leave the anxiety and fear behind you on your won, it's proper you see one.
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meridannight Wrote:men are amazing creatures. so attractive, so sublime, beautiful, exceptional. i love being around men, interacting with them, talking to them, getting to know them, taking care of them. i enjoy all that.
so, i don't have a reason to fear them. i want to be around them, and i love men. whether just as friends, casual encounters/acquaintances, or lovers, i love them. i have a profound deep connection with certain men, that is the best thing in life to experience.
the question is reversed, i think. why is it that you feel fear/anxiety around men?
I think I just had an orgasm reading that. wtf. So positive. Oh my God. WOW.
tbh. I'm happy for your perspective. omg. 
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larafan25 Wrote:I think I just had an orgasm reading that. wtf. So positive. Oh my God. WOW.
tbh. I'm happy for your perspective. omg.
well, i guess that means i can now say i've made a guy cum with my words alone.  that's a first.
but, seriously, that's just the truth. guys are a pleasure. in every way that's possible.
''Do I look civilized to you?''
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Don't let other people's hangups and issues become your own.
It is a fact that there are gay men out in the world. Straight men have to accept this and move on. I believe a great deal of the hatred is self-hate. They can't stand that they might be attracted to a man and so lash out at anyone who is.
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I assume you mean you think straight men are judging you or that any straight men you might meet in the future might judge you. Maybe, when you run into straight men, try to pretend they're naked.
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meridannight Wrote:men are amazing creatures. so attractive, so sublime, beautiful, exceptional. i love being around men, interacting with them, talking to them, getting to know them, taking care of them. i enjoy all that.
so, i don't have a reason to fear them. i want to be around them, and i love men. whether just as friends, casual encounters/acquaintances, or lovers, i love them. i have a profound deep connection with certain men, that is the best thing in life to experience.
the question is reversed, i think. why is it that you feel fear/anxiety around men?
It's just about being judged as a 'lesser' being. I feel like there is an urgent need to 'prove' in an obvious way that I am somehow worth it, and that I deserve being considered.
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himself Wrote:I assume you mean you think straight men are judging you or that any straight men you might meet in the future might judge you. Maybe, when you run into straight men, try to pretend they're naked.
Haha yeah, but how would it help to pretend they're naked? XD
Me: "Hey there straight guy!"
Straight guy: "Dude! My face is up here. Stop staring at my crotch!" ?
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cavillr Wrote:It's just about being judged as a 'lesser' being. I feel like there is an urgent need to 'prove' in an obvious way that I am somehow worth it, and that I deserve being considered.
i don't feel like that when interacting with men.
it's not there by default, at least not for homosexuality itself. i can say this with certainty.
''Do I look civilized to you?''
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cavillr Wrote:It's just about being judged as a 'lesser' being. I feel like there is an urgent need to 'prove' in an obvious way that I am somehow worth it, and that I deserve being considered. Sounds to me like the real problem is you don't respect yourself. If you think you are, or might be, "lesser" than a straight man, chances are they're not going to respect you very much. OTOH, if you respect yourself for who you are, what difference does it make what anyone else thinks of you. Besides, you do realize that anyone who doesn't know you, doesn't really THINK about you at all, right? They might have a fleeting impression of you, good or bad or indifferent. But once you're no longer in their line of sight, they've forgotten all about you. Just like you'll have forgotten all about them.
Life is full of problems. Don't create any were they don't exist. Doing so makes your life much more difficult.
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