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Am I overthinking?
#11
aethe Wrote:Well, it appears I was over thinking. He's more friendly to other people than me so... To be honest, I'm kinda sad. I really wish something more could happen. God I'm so stupid. I actually thought things this time would be different. I actually thought someone finally likes me...

Don't sell yourself short just because one guy isn't into you. Theres plenty more out there and I'm sure you will find someone soon.
[COLOR="Purple"]As I grow to understand less and less,
I learn to love it more and more.
[/COLOR]
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#12
Well...he obviously likes you so I think the best thing is to let it unfold as it will and give your mind a rest.....enjoy the interaction in the moment for what it is and go with the flow.
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#13
Well, he likes you and I guess you like him too... so, you can just stay friends! He sounds like he's a good, friendly person! And of course, this is not the last man on earth! You'll find someone, eventually! Smile
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#14
East Wrote:Well...he obviously likes you so I think the best thing is to let it unfold as it will and give your mind a rest.....enjoy the interaction in the moment for what it is and go with the flow.

Well I thought he liked me, but apparently he's more friendly to others. I mean after that day, he seems to disregard me (e.g. Hey "insert name" look at the funny youtube I just sent you" or leaving without even saying good bye, and I didn't even know he left). So clearly I'm not special or anything. It's clear I was only over thinking.

James9 Wrote:Well, he likes you and I guess you like him too... so, you can just stay friends! He sounds like he's a good, friendly person! And of course, this is not the last man on earth! You'll find someone, eventually! Smile

He is a good person. I wish him the best. During the hangout I honestly thought if it was all real, he was too good for a person like me, who is average looking with self-esteem issues and anxiety disorder.
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#15
aethe Wrote:Well I thought he liked me, but apparently he's more friendly to others. I mean after that day, he seems to disregard me (e.g. Hey "insert name" look at the funny youtube I just sent you" or leaving without even saying good bye, and I didn't even know he left). So clearly I'm not special or anything. It's clear I was only over thinking.



He is a good person. I wish him the best. During the hangout I honestly thought if it was all real, he was too good for a person like me, who is average looking with self-esteem issues and anxiety disorder.

So you are basing this on what you THINK his actions mean instead of asking him.

Here is the problem.... If you are not showing/demonstrating interest in him he is going to assume this means there is no interest and he will pull away.

The only real way to show interest is to ask him point blank: Would you be interested in a relationship with me?

Yes he may scream and shout and run for hills screaming 'No!' all the way - yes rejection hurts - however not knowing hurts more and this game of playing 'read my mind' never - NEVER - ends well.

The next time you see him (face to face) ask him what he feels/thinks. No not a text, not an email, and not even over the telephone - face to face so you can read his body language and facial expressions.
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#16
Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:So you are basing this on what you THINK his actions mean instead of asking him.

Here is the problem.... If you are not showing/demonstrating interest in him he is going to assume this means there is no interest and he will pull away.

The only real way to show interest is to ask him point blank: Would you be interested in a relationship with me?

Yes he may scream and shout and run for hills screaming 'No!' all the way - yes rejection hurts - however not knowing hurts more and this game of playing 'read my mind' never - NEVER - ends well.

The next time you see him (face to face) ask him what he feels/thinks. No not a text, not an email, and not even over the telephone - face to face so you can read his body language and facial expressions.

Okay, but why would he feel I'm not interested? I was with him the entire time on that day. He asked for a hug, and I gave him a hug etc. I don't know, I'll be seeing him again soon. I'll just see what his actions would be, and based on that I'll decide whether to ask him or not.
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#17
So I came out to him, and confessed at the same time. He told me he IS ALSO gay, but he made it perfectly clear I'm not his type and that he is into another guy at his workplace. Surprisingly, I wasn't as upset as I thought I would be. I always thought coming out and confession would cause so many emotional stress to me, but it actually made me felt relieved... Even though he rejected me, at least I got the answer and can finally move on. We still friends but.
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#18
aethe Wrote:So I came out to him, and confessed at the same time. He told me he IS ALSO gay, but he made it perfectly clear I'm not his type and that he is into another guy at his workplace. Surprisingly, I wasn't as upset as I thought I would be. I always thought coming out and confession would cause so many emotional stress to me, but it actually made me felt relieved... Even though he rejected me, at least I got the answer and can finally move on. We still friends but.

I feel that's great to be able to remain as friends.

I'll always put friends before a relationship. Are you out to your other friends or family? Maybe, you actually liked the company as "bromance" rather than "romance" hence you didn't really felt upset? Just my two cents. Smile
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#19
jontan Wrote:I feel that's great to be able to remain as friends.

I'll always put friends before a relationship. Are you out to your other friends or family? Maybe, you actually liked the company as "bromance" rather than "romance" hence you didn't really felt upset? Just my two cents. Smile

When I came out and got rejected it was okay. Then I decided to come out to the rest of my friends, and it feels okay and great. They didn't care, most of them joke that they always seen my like that anyway. The worst part is how literally all my friends thought we were together, and every time they brought it up, it just really upset me. Now it's just difficult seeing him. I thought that I would be okay as I wasn't that upset when he rejected me, so why am feeling upset because my friends thought we're together???

I want him to be happy, and I hope he'll find someone he woukd love and be happy with, but at the same time I kinda hope he doesn't... I really hate that part of me.
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