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Another questioning sexuality thread, but with a twist
#11
Thank you all for your replies. I feel more at ease and feel there is a solution- sorta. Now I just have to find that other mythical guy that wants a relationship this early in life and we like each other lol.
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#12
I was only suggesting a relationship, not necessarily long-term commitment.


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Fred

Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
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#13
I can understand this. I was (almost) in the same boat. The only difference is that I didn't feel ready. After this, I wasn't able to get an erection for a few days. Because of this, I started to panic, but one of my friends told me it could have been a number of things.
1) Perhaps I just didn't like the guy... which was kinda true.
2) I wasn't ready. Definitely true.
3) I was nervous seeing as how I've never had sex. Also true.

I thought about it, and it made me feel better, as these things all fit me. It made me reallise that if I found a guy I truely cared for, thent I probably wouldn't have this issue at all.
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#14
BinarySurfer, are you a smoker? I have not yet read any of the other offers to solve your erection problem but it is true that being a smoker can reduce your capacities to become erect. Maybe it's time to cut down, if you are. Just a suggestion.
My other thought was that you were not really into the guys even though you thought the idea hot (on paper). It's a different thing to get naked and do the nasty with a total stranger and with someone you know and trust. I'm getting the impression that you would fare much better in that department if you were to get with someone and learn to know them and trust them first.
If all else fails, speak to your physician?
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#15
Ozzmandius Wrote:I can understand this. I was (almost) in the same boat. The only difference is that I didn't feel ready. After this, I wasn't able to get an erection for a few days. Because of this, I started to panic, but one of my friends told me it could have been a number of things.
1) Perhaps I just didn't like the guy... which was kinda true.
2) I wasn't ready. Definitely true.
3) I was nervous seeing as how I've never had sex. Also true.

I thought about it, and it made me feel better, as these things all fit me. It made me reallise that if I found a guy I truely cared for, thent I probably wouldn't have this issue at all.

Ozzmandius, even with a guy you are really into, you might occasionally, or at the start, have erection problems. If it isn't erection problems it might just be ejaculation problems. It's ok to reassure your partner then, that it's no big deal if you don't come, as long as you are both enjoying the closeness. If your partner can come, then fine, if you can't come, never mind. It takes a little bit of time to get used to someone, and also it'll take time for them to find what makes you tick. The mental process is very important there. For those of us who have resorted to masturbation a lot, because of having no other sexual outlet, it takes time to get your body used to someone else's touch and to letting them take control of your pleasure centres.
Good luck, in any case with your first encounter(s).
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#16
Ozzmandius Wrote:I can understand this. I was (almost) in the same boat. The only difference is that I didn't feel ready. After this, I wasn't able to get an erection for a few days. Because of this, I started to panic, but one of my friends told me it could have been a number of things.
1) Perhaps I just didn't like the guy... which was kinda true.
2) I wasn't ready. Definitely true.
3) I was nervous seeing as how I've never had sex. Also true.

I thought about it, and it made me feel better, as these things all fit me. It made me reallise that if I found a guy I truely cared for, thent I probably wouldn't have this issue at all.
After a lot of thought from everyones responses, I definitely agree with the conclusion of your post. I share your three reasons too and they would definitely hinder the ability to feel comfortable to open up and relax. Thanks Big Grin


princealbertofb Wrote:BinarySurfer, are you a smoker? I have not yet read any of the other offers to solve your erection problem but it is true that being a smoker can reduce your capacities to become erect. Maybe it's time to cut down, if you are. Just a suggestion.
No, I am not a smoker, so fortunately that is not an issue Big Grin

princealbertofb Wrote:It's a different thing to get naked and do the nasty with a total stranger and with someone you know and trust. I'm getting the impression that you would fare much better in that department if you were to get with someone and learn to know them and trust them first.
After this intervention, I feel confident that that is the main reason why I'm having difficulty, thanks Big Grin
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#17
BinarySurfer, you remind me of myself when i was younger. I only had two brothers but i had to take care of the house. I had to go to school and keep my grades up. I had to cook dinner and clean the house while my mom was at work. I had an after school job on certain days. I never really had time to just relax. I still have a hard time just completely relaxing and just have fun. I think you just need to be with a person youre truly into. I mean a person you are in love with. I have moments when i see a guy and i just want to jump on him, but i never will let myself. I've never had a problem getting it up, but i could never just have sex with anyone. Which is why im still a virgin lol. I want to have sex with someone i truly care for.
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#18
SleepTalker Wrote:BinarySurfer, you remind me of myself when i was younger. I only had two brothers but i had to take care of the house. I had to go to school and keep my grades up. I had to cook dinner and clean the house while my mom was at work. I had an after school job on certain days. I never really had time to just relax. I still have a hard time just completely relaxing and just have fun. I think you just need to be with a person youre truly into. I mean a person you are in love with. I have moments when i see a guy and i just want to jump on him, but i never will let myself. I've never had a problem getting it up, but i could never just have sex with anyone. Which is why im still a virgin lol. I want to have sex with someone i truly care for.

Awww, that's so sweet Big Grin
We do have very similar lives, I just left all the abuse and other rotten shit out, lol
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