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Blessed are the cracked because they let in the light.
#1
TWENTY FIVE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE !!!!

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are missing.

10.... Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine

12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it

17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

18.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

19.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

20..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

21.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

22.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

23.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

24.. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

25.. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on. Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends! Life is too short and friends are too few!
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#2
Very cute . . . .
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#3
hahahahhah!
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#4
Thanks for these. They made me smile today.
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