Rate Thread
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Came out to a friend, his behavior hurts me
#11
he needs time to process.
or he's not really open-minded as you think.

if he doesn't want to talk to you anymore, that's his problem, not yours
Reply

#12
Give him time to adjust to the news. If he is a true friend he will accept you for you. If he can't then he is more of an ''imaginary'' than a real friend.
Reply

#13
Congratulations on coming out~! With all that have been said by others,maybe your friend just need a bit more time to adjust. But it won't hurt if you reassure him he's not your type (or even if he is,just lie for now,lol).
Reply

#14
Thanks for your support guys. Obviously he's not that much of a friend to me. I wanted to tell him how I feel and that he's the first person I've came out to. He just shrugged with this pokerfaced expression, like it would be no big deal. I thought he'd understand, as he even supports incest, that's what he said in our psyhology class, when he claimed that love is love no matter what. And now...doesn't sound like that anymore.
Reply

#15
People say a lot of things in theoretical situations - like in class - but often act very differently when confronted by reality. I'm sorry that you had to deal with that - but please don't let it keep you from expressing yourself to others - everyone is not going to react negatively. I came out at 18 and had a mixed bag of reactions. There's a line from an old song, I actually forget what the song is, but the line is "./..you can't please everyone so you might as well please yourself..." - Good luck and stay strong, you are certainly not alone.
Reply

#16
Uneunsae Wrote:Some straight guys assume that you are going to hit on them just because you are gay is if being gay means you want to have sex with every man alive.

This is exactly what I was thinking. People tend to stereotype even without trying. Just continue to be yourself and maybe the typical gay stereotype he has can be changed through your actions.
Reply

#17
I know this is hard on you, most of us in here has probably experienced the same if not worse.
Aside from the fact that you're being hurt by his ignorance try and put yourself in his shoes. Not sure if it's your first time coming out (congratulations on that part) but there's a big chance you're the first to come out to him and so he wouldn't know how to respond to that.
There's also a high probability that he never socialized with people that are gay. So if this is all correct, you can't blame his ignorance. If you never played a game but you often hear about it, that doesn't mean you will be able to play it perfectly the first time you're holding a controller..

Give him a chance to process what just happened, he's probably trying to think about all those times you guys were together and how he didn't see this coming, when you get a chance just stay calm and explain to him why you're his friend and why he is yours and make it clear that he doesn't have to worry about you hitting on him. Tell him (jokingly) you can do better... Or something like that. Smile

Outing yourself to a guy is much more difficult then a girl unless that girl happens to be in love with you for 5 years (which was in my case) *-shivers-* Smile

I hope things will sort out for you quickly, wish you much luck!
Reply

#18
James Wrote:just like parents have to adjust sometimes, friends sometimes need to also, I would not scrap your friend just cause he reacted this way, give it a little time and see if he becomes more accepting, you are the same person you were, Jim

I agree. Maybe he just needz time to adjust.
Reply



Related Threads…
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Think i'm in love with my straight friend. Help! scidork 23 1,515 01-29-2017, 06:09 PM
Last Post: Jamie
  Just "broke up" with parasitic friend Bluelight 6 887 10-29-2014, 07:27 AM
Last Post: Jason74
  "knock knock" who's there "its me your good friend depression" Spree 19 1,539 07-21-2014, 07:21 PM
Last Post: Iceblink
  Crushing on your friend's ex boyfriend Anonymous 3 749 06-16-2014, 05:21 PM
Last Post: Adam
  Obsession with Straight Friend MoodyRayan29 9 1,580 05-20-2013, 09:04 PM
Last Post: archubbycub

Forum Jump:


Recently Browsing
1 Guest(s)

© 2002-2024 GaySpeak.com