You don't and won't know until you ask. If you feel it's going to be plaguing your mind, just bring it up casually over dinner. Relationships are all about open communication. Express yourself and let yourself be heard. It's the only way to go. Don't over think it.
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Well, a slight update.
He ended up canceling our dinner plans, but I kind of expected it due to him saying he has a very busy week at work. But he did apologize about it. Since he said he was going to be busy all weekend as well, my impatience kind of got the better of me and I just asked him through text instead. Yeah probably a bad move since I wanted to discuss it in person, but I wanted some kind of answer.
I asked him where he saw things going between us. He told me he just recently got out of a long term relationship and is still a little messed up from it, and trying to get back on his feet and doesn't want to rush anything. He said he enjoys spending time with me though, and made it sound like he wants to continue that. I said that was fine, and I was okay with taking things slow and seeing what happens.
He also apologized for what happened between us (meaning when we had sex), and said he wasnt sure if I had been ready for that. I told him I was, and that I still like him, and want to see where things go, and he seemed like he agreed with that.
Again, for me it was still kind of a weird change, from us hanging out and/or communicating almost all the time, to practically nothing for several days in a row. Since we had this text conversation I haven't heard from him - again, thats probably because he's been so busy. And I'm not going to initiate any more communication from here on out until he makes the first move - to me, that will show he actually still is interested in continuing things and seeing where they go.
It'll be a disappointment if things fizzle out because I felt such a strong connection to him.....and the pessimist in me is telling me that he'll eventually just forget about me and I won't hear from him again. But I'll keep my fingers crossed that that won't happen.
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Thanks for the update [MENTION=22224]bv33[/MENTION],
See you WERE not the problem, you didn't do anything wrong. Even if he said you did something wrong, just take it as a lesson and move on. My honest opinion, I dislike the whole waiting game situation, because you actually don't know if he is waiting on you to call him or something. If I was in that situation, I would probably wait for a week or so then ask him to hang out whenever convenient for both of us.
One question, is he the kind of person that easy to please? (don't know if that is the right description). Like let's say when you ask him what he wants to do next, he is okay by whatever you want. Also if you want to plan things out, he also say whatever is fine with him.
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I don't want to feel like I'm pestering him though. I've been the one to suggest hanging out the past few times, and now this time when I suggested we go to dinner, he ended up canceling. Yeah, it was because of work related reasons, but I feel like if I ask him AGAIN it may come across as being too one sided. If he really is interested in still hanging out, I would hope he would make the effort to suggest getting together rather than me having to do it.
We haven't really made official plans often enough for me to tell if he's easy to please. In fact the only times we've "officially" planned anything out it was his doing - he invited me over to his place to watch movies, he invited me over to a friend's dinner party, etc. But that was all during those couple weeks when we were constantly talking to each other, and now the past week there has been next to no communication.
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I'll be blunt here.
I think he's trying to extract himself and the more you push and pursue, the more uncomfortable he is going to be.
So the decision to not be the one to call or text is a good one.
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Exactly, and that's what I'm worried about too.
He did mention to me that he doesn't want us to stop hanging out, and that he does like spending time with me. But his lack of communication is kind of hinting to me that he at least wants a break from me, which is why I think if I hold off on texting or calling him until he does, it'll let me know for sure if he still does care or not.
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I see, in that case it's hard to tell. I guess at this moment don't think about it, or wait too much for him to call. Just do your business, and if nothing changed, just move on.
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I can tell you from personal experience. If you were not prepared and you all did it, maybe that may have turned him off. I know for me at least, i don't appreciate it when someone is not prepared for it. If you catch what I'm saying. Maybe could be that who knows.
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LOL [MENTION=21084]Virge[/MENTION] haha
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