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Ex-Gay
#21
Life is complicated enough with out labels.
Live and let live.

Be true to yourself and enjoy life.
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#22
Niltra Wrote:I may only be speaking for myself but I am going to die one day and I do F*cking intend to be me until that day, weather I die for that very reason or if its from old age in a bed.

I love you, and this has to be one of the greatest quotes of the century Bighug
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#23
dfiant Wrote:I love you, and this has to be one of the greatest quotes of the century Bighug

Hehe thank you so much ^^Bighug
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#24
Honestly just tell epople youre not looking for sex and thats that. yeesh why go and lie to the world about being gay? If you can't face the heat, then get out of the kitchen. Lie to yourself all you want, but don't say you're an ex-gay to further perputrate the idea that gays can change their orientation cause guess what by you doing that, you're instilling in people or parents that they can change other people somehow and that will cause more pain and so on. Its a chain reaction dude and don't you dare put that energy out there, or else it'll bite ya in the ass. (Not threatening just saying)
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#25
WheresTheLove Wrote:Ok I'm sorry, it's just the last sentence you said in your first reply here, that I was being an idiot or whatever, I guess it kinda hurt me. :\ What you said wasn't bad, just the way it was worded.

Attacks and gay bashings still do happen today. Not as often, but the fact that I do occasionally hear about them here is scary. Usually they are on the more feminine men/masculine women. I'm not wearing pink and saying "Hey gurl you look fab!", but I'm really not a masculine guy at all so it concerns me because I have trouble faking masculinity at times. I know I'm way too paranoid, but that's just how I am. I'd rather fake friends than no real ones. I mean think about this: there's a watch you really want but could never afford. The fake version of it is extremely cheap. Would you rather that or nothing?

In due respect, didn't that method work? I mean didn't his word get to you by being just straight forward though?

But sincerely to be being gay is not to fall into stereotypes, feminine/masculine are simply just old norms to determine how a person is behaving or things in general... Fuck that! Out with the old in with the new, after all we're just humans and shall be identified as it. Just be your self. As TomStatic said, Just relax...
Sometimes you need a bit of chaos in your life to be able to shrug off pitiful disdain about something meaningless.
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#26
"Never try to take your place in society. Stay exactly where you are and let society form itself around you" - Quentin Crisp.
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#27
Sounds like a very terrible attempt to cover up cowardance. Stop fleeing from yourself. You'll find that the only person that can hurt you the most is yourself. Don't be a fool. Get with the program.
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#28
As the resident bitcher/whinter/moaner here on the boards, I gotta say it disheartens me to see someone as young as you living in such fear and self-hatred (because, yes, that's what it is). I took a while to come out to myself (early 20 something I think?), and it's been a process, but I can see where I've been (a long distance) and where I'm still going (yet another long distance).

Let me ask you this: are afraid of getting gay-bashed by some insensitive soul or are you afraid of other gay men?

I've more or less gotten over my fear of the former (really, most people don't give a shit that you're heading into the gay bar around the corner)....but strange gay men at bars is still a hurdle I'm clearing, based on mixed results from my past.

And I'm here to tell you: yes, eff yes, a lot of guys are jerks. Slovenly, drunken, touchy-grabby don't-know-proper-boundaries jerks. It's gonna happen, but you've gotta learn to to deal. I'm still learning it, at age 30. Your 19, so you've got a head start on me.

And really, at 19, how many gay men have you met and dated? How much of the world have seen and experienced outside of where you grew up? You can't say with certain positivity that there aren't any out there who match well with you. I often feel that way, I know the territory, but I've seen too many other non-scene, non-stereotypical gay men wind up with their perfect match, so it gives me hope.

I hope there's still hope in your heart, too.
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#29
I think dysfunction is the rule rather than the exception for all orientations. That is, while there are some interesting cosmetic differences from gay relationships I see hets (both male and female) having to put up with all kinds of BS, drama, head games, deceit, cheating, and even abuse as anyone gay. I really believe that one reason Jerry Springer is so popular is to make people feel better that their own lives and relationships aren't even worse than they are.

I can understand the desire for celibacy and have strongly considered it myself...but when it works it's like making it to the top of a mountain after a grueling climb (disclaimer: I've never climbed a mountain). Confusedmile:
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#30
Drew Wrote:Let me ask you this: are afraid of getting gay-bashed by some insensitive soul or are you afraid of other gay men?
Both. And I want to be respected and make new friends easily and get a job.
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