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First Name: Dick, Last Name: Head
#1
So my mom and dad got divorced when I was 8 years old. I do remember my dad being a dick to her back then. He never hurt her physically but words can hurt more sometimes(you do the math) I'm the only one that she has in this world. She never had a healthy relationship. She was way too good for all the guys she thought she'd see. I don't get it how could anyone hurt someone so unique, pure like that?(I'm sorry but I can't be modest about it) Even tho she never told me I always felt how she was feeling. She was lonely and hurt. And we're all human beings we get lonely sometimes and even if we've got a million friends we can still feel lonely if we don't have anyone to love. She had all the rights to feel that way.
She's actually seeing someone right now and she seems very happy but the guy she's with UGH! This guy is extremely religious and ignorant he's the kind of guy who goes "it's adam and eve!!". He knows about me apparently my mother told him about me while they were getting to know each other. He's cool to me when mom's around and all but he gives me that disgusted look when she isn't.
One of my best friends was around to spend the night, this guy my mom's seeing(let's call him Dick lol it suits well) was around too waiting for mom to get dressed.. I made a move and hold my friend's hand and gave him a gentle hug to see Dick's reaction(he could easily see us). He looked like he just saw a 3-headed snake. I disgust him! Ha-ha
I haven't talked to her about this situation. She's happy after all. I don't wanna shit on it just to avoid all the annoyed looks he gives me. But she'll find out that he's not that gay friendly at all and that's gonna upset her and it'll end their relationship I know it 'cause she's one hell of a supporter and would never date someone who hates me, the only one that she has, the only one who would never hurt her.
So yeah that's what I've been dealing with... :/
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#2
yoyoyo148 Wrote:So my mom and dad got divorced when I was 8 years old. I do remember my dad being a dick to her back then. He never hurt her physically but words can hurt more sometimes(you do the math) I'm the only one that she has in this world. She never had a healthy relationship. She was way too good for all the guys she thought she'd see. I don't get it how could anyone hurt someone so unique, pure like that?(I'm sorry but I can't be modest about it) Even tho she never told me I always felt how she was feeling. She was lonely and hurt. And we're all human beings we get lonely sometimes and even if we've got a million friends we can still feel lonely if we don't have anyone to love. She had all the rights to feel that way.
She's actually seeing someone right now and she seems very happy but the guy she's with UGH! This guy is extremely religious and ignorant he's the kind of guy who goes "it's adam and eve!!". He knows about me apparently my mother told him about me while they were getting to know each other. He's cool to me when mom's around and all but he gives me that disgusted look when she isn't.
One of my best friends was around to spend the night, this guy my mom's seeing(let's call him Dick lol it suits well) was around too waiting for mom to get dressed.. I made a move and hold my friend's hand and gave him a gentle hug to see Dick's reaction(he could easily see us). He looked like he just saw a 3-headed snake. I disgust him! Ha-ha
I haven't talked to her about this situation. She's happy after all. I don't wanna shit on it just to avoid all the annoyed looks he gives me. But she'll find out that he's not that gay friendly at all and that's gonna upset her and it'll end their relationship I know it 'cause she's one hell of a supporter and would never date someone who hates me, the only one that she has, the only one who would never hurt her.
So yeah that's what I've been dealing with... :/

Sounds tough but maybe he is tolerant, but he hasn't experienced being around that much. If he hasn't openly expressed anything it is pretty good, unless he is outwardly telling you that you are devil spawn then I don't think you really have a problem yet.

Just remember that tolerance is just that, you tolerate it. It doesn't mean you have to like what you are experiencing.
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#3
Maybe his mind will be more open after seeing that you are a good guy and blahblahblah.
People change his opinion about a lot of things, even religious and bigot people; they only need more time and a good reason, like being very interested in make your mom happy, even accpeting her son.

Be patient and try to be friendly with him, when he's around.
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#4
Snake is a perfect word to describe this piece of crap. I have definitely had dealings with scum of this nature.

I dont know how you will handle it, but he's BAD news! These jerks tend to be super "sweet and understanding" until they get their "foot firmly in the door". Then he will show his true colors to you.

These types tend to prey on people like your mother. Lonely and showing it, and happy to take anyone who smiles at her. Dangerous for HER and you.

I would find a way to wean her off of this guy somehow. He's going to be nothing but trouble.
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#5
Laugh

I love how you're getting such a kick out of freaking him out with your displays of "gayness",
especially with knowing how he's in a tight spot
when it comes to how he can't react to it
due to him being with your mother....
I'd probably do the same in your situation just for laughs!


On another note, you made a point of letting us know how much you adore your mother,
how she's been through hard times when it comes to having men in her life......
like you said: she's happy!


I'd say, continue biting your lip
when it comes to his looks of heightened disapproval
of you being gay for your mother's sake....


She's happy, he's tolerant,
and you're free to be you around both of them....


Don't push it with him
because your mom finally has someone decent in her life,
and she's no longer lonely; help her keep it that way!


Plus, he may ease up, as time goes on,
with more exposure to your "gayness".
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#6
It's tough...

your mom deserves to be happy...and you too..

If the following conditions meet, I agree with you putting up with it:

1.- He's good to her and doesnpt treat her bad.

2.- His dislike of homosexuality doesn't go as far as physically threatening you

if either your mom is being treated badly or the guy will get violent with you, you need to speak up.
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#7
If you know what your mom is needing in a mate, you might want to go hunting for one yourself.
It might not hurt for you to play cupid, even if its just to see if it works out for you and your mother.

You are more "open" to see what these guys are like than she would be at this point in her life.

Just an option/suggestion.
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