Hi

[gregs317]

Hi, I'm Greg and this is my 1st post here. Anyways, I'm 40 and live here in PA, USA. I feel like around age 25, but all the people around that age usually call me 'sir' if they don't know me. I know, they're trying to be respectful, but it's still taking some getting used to, lol.

I live in a small kinda town, and most people around here are str8/married and there's more of a conservative vibe than liberal, for the most part anyway.

My mom just died around the end of February. We were real close, and I miss her a lot. I always depended on her for advice, acceptance, and even friendship (kinda). We talked every night before she went to bed, and I got used to running errands for her (she didn't drive, and my dad has been deceased since I was a kid). She asked me once if I was gay, I said no. I think deep down she suspected I might be and that I just wasn't able to say the words. She accepted me anyway, and didn't pressure me too much.

On a different note, I think someone called me the 'f' word today (fag...) and in public no less! I just finished grocery shopping and was still in the market near the check-out area. And I heard someone call me that - it was a guy with his wife, and there were 1 or 2 little kids with them. I couldn't believe he said it out loud, in front of everyone. I was shocked at hearing the word, and briefly turned my head, then kept walking out the door.

I guess I haven't been completely discrete about checking out guys' butts and whatever else at the market. Even tho it is mostly str8 men, it's fun to take a quick peek sometimes, you know what I mean..

So yeah, I'm not confrontational unless it's someone who I know. And I'm shy to begin with, so there's no way I was going to confront the person. I also have issues with being assertive and standing up for myself, I'd rather just avoid the situation. I've been thinking a lot about moving out of this town anyway, since I only came here when my mom moved to this town. My brother is still here, and I hate to move away from him, but I'm ready to get out of this town (maybe this summer or fall). I'm not working so I'm free in that regard.

Sorry this got to be so long, but it feels good to vent a little. If you have any suggestions, advice, or to just say hi, that would be great. Greg

[Kiid]

RIP your mom.

On a different note, I think someone called me the 'f' word today (fag...) and in public no less! I just finished grocery shopping and was still in the market near the check-out area. And I heard someone call me that - it was a guy with his wife, and there were 1 or 2 little kids with them. I couldn't believe he said it out loud, in front of everyone. I was shocked at hearing the word, and briefly turned my head, then kept walking out the door.

There are some sad people out there. Some homophobes that need to learn about homosexuality and need to keep their comments to themselves. And for all they know their kids could be gay.

[albabonzai]

Dont apologise as there is nothing to apologise for!

welcome to GS xx

I love when someone New to GS posts a few paragraphs, means we get to know a bit about you faster!!

And no matter where you go you will always have some homophobe to deal with. Its not right but some ppl will just not change!!

Welcome again.

Bazz xxxxxxx

[marshlander]

Hi Greg and welcome. Sorry for your loss. I still miss my mum even though she died 9 years ago. I didn't get to come out to her either. I would have loved her to meet my partner of the past few years. Hope you like being here. It's a good place to vent.

[fredv3b]

Welcome to GS,

Sorry to hear about your recent loss.

So yeah, I'm not confrontational unless it's someone who I know. And I'm shy to begin with, so there's no way I was going to confront the person. I also have issues with being assertive and standing up for myself, I'd rather just avoid the situation.

On the one hand I know how you feel and I too would rather avoid confrontation, however on the other hand I think that people will continue to harass us if we let them, if we don't stand up for ourselves who else will?

I've been thinking a lot about moving out of this town anyway, since I only came here when my mom moved to this town. My brother is still here, and I hate to move away from him, but I'm ready to get out of this town (maybe this summer or fall).

Where would you move to? I think you need a reason to move to somewhere not just away from where you are now.

[gregs317]

Thanks for the replies. The desire for me to move away was enhanced by the incident. But honestly, I've been thinking of moving for a long while anyway. Like I said, I only came to this town to be near my mom and bro. Not that she was holding me back, but now I'm freer to live wherever I want.

Anybody know where I can find out which towns around the USA are gay-friendly and/or have gay communities? Any good websites I can check out? I know there's a book "50 Fabulous Gay-Friendly Places to Live" but would like to get some ideas online. I need to stay near the East coast USA, since I have an extended family here in PA. Greg