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Hormonal cycles...? Puzzled.
#1
Hi everyone! This is a bit complicated to explain, so I'll try and keep this as short as possible; technically, I'm bisexual, but leaning mostly towards men. However, I identify as gay because my sexual attraction to women very is weak by comparison to my sexual attraction to men, and my emotional attraction to women is even weaker. My sexual attraction to women stays consistent, always fairly weak. My sexual attraction to men however fluctuates. Some weeks, I have these raging urges and I want to be with a man so bad, but other times, this attraction drops, sometimes as low as my attraction to women. It's during these times that I sometimes find myself fantasizing about having vaginal sex, which is very confusing for me. I think this might also play a role in the fact that my self-esteem fluctuates in the same way, but this isn't always consistent with what I was describing, so I don't really know. Anyway, does anyone else experience this, if not just a little bit? I've never really heard of this happening before, so I was wondering if this was normal.
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#2
For lack of a better term, this is known as 'discovering yourself'. You are working through a phase of growing up, finding out what it is you like. Everybody goes through this.

Some people go through it early in life, others in their 20's, some in their 30's, and even some later in life. Everybody "blooms" at different times.

You are just discovering yourself. Nothing to worry about. You will figure yourself out soon enough.
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#3
MisterTinkles Wrote:For lack of a better term, this is known as 'discovering yourself'. You are working through a phase of growing up, finding out what it is you like. Everybody goes through this.

Some people go through it early in life, others in their 20's, some in their 30's, and even some later in life. Everybody "blooms" at different times.

You are just discovering yourself. Nothing to worry about. You will figure yourself out soon enough.

Fair enough. To be perfectly honest though, I'm just a little worried that I may have spent all this time being closeted only to eventually find out that I actually do like women... Realistically, I don't feel like that's going to happen because I'm overwhelmingly attracted to men, and I have been for years, but the possibility of it scares me to no end. High school was hell because I felt like I couldn't be who I was, I don't want my suffering to have been for nothing.
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#4
Why limit yourself? Who says you HAVE to be "one way or the other"????

You want to date a woman, go date a woman. Someone else recently posted pretty much the same topic. I told them that they can date who they feel like. There are a lot of girls out there who like dating guys who are not all sex and macho shit. What would it hurt for you to find a nice girl? Scared she would become a good friend? Man or woman, they are just people. Dont be scared....just make friends. Nobody can ever have too many friends.
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#5
I suppose you're right, but it still scares me... I don't want to have gone through so much for the sake of my attraction to men only to end up with a woman. Maybe I'm thinking too hard... after all, I'm pretty certain I'll always prefer men, but there was also a time when I thought the opposite. The unpredictability scares me.
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#6
Think you were referring to me there tinkles Wink
Yeah I feel the same attracted to guys and girls but if I'm honest with myself lean more to guys so I understand we're your coming from. I also go thru periods of not being attracted to guys as much and I slip into denial I guess about that side of me and try to focus on girls. But tinkles is right it dosnt matter who you date or find attractive, tho it takes a lot to get your head round I know.
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#7
Eth21 Wrote:Think you were referring to me there tinkles Wink
Yeah I feel the same attracted to guys and girls but if I'm honest with myself lean more to guys so I understand we're your coming from. I also go thru periods of not being attracted to guys as much and I slip into denial I guess about that side of me and try to focus on girls. But tinkles is right it dosnt matter who you date or find attractive, tho it takes a lot to get your head round I know.

Yup, pretty much the same as what I mean, except when I do think of girls (which is only once in a while), it still doesn't feel like it does when I think of guys, but for some reason it seems like I get bored with them sometimes. Maybe that's what happens when we think about our sexuality too much? I don't know... I need coffee.
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#8
Bluelight Wrote:Yup, pretty much the same as what I mean, except when I do think of girls (which is only once in a while), it still doesn't feel like it does when I think of guys, but for some reason it seems like I get bored with them sometimes. Maybe that's what happens when we think about our sexuality too much? I don't know... I need coffee.

Yeah I've been told I over think just about everything so could very well be the case... And with you on the coffee cept i prefer tea! Wink
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#9
Eth21 Wrote:Yeah I've been told I over think just about everything so could very well be the case... And with you on the coffee cept i prefer tea! Wink

Tea's nice too. My family consumes just as much tea as we do coffee actually, we're weird like that haha
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