Rate Thread
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Horrible homophobic neighbour
#21
^only if you tap out
Reply

#22
Definitely talk to the landlord. There must be some kind of protection you can pursue, this is 100% pure harassment. You can bet that if this were a man doing this to a woman, the police would have done something. If you can get in contact with the police officers' superior, you should report them for their failure to handle this problem.
Reply

#23
His power over you is to get the fear response from you. Any retort or defense from you, and he can tell that he's able to get under your skin. If you try to reason with him, it seems like he'll know you're pleading with him to stop. The way I'd handle it? Pretend that it doesn't bother you at all.

If he sees you coming down the stairs and makes another one of his oh-so-retarded comments, just say "good morning!", smile, and go out the door. Just reply to any of his stuff with one or two greeting-like phrases. "Hey, how ya doin?"..."Sup?"..."Hello"....any of those will work. Just say it, smile, and quickly move on. That will take the piss out of his fun.

It's great, IMO, since it's non-confrontational, shows that you're not a coward (you can stand your ground without leaving), AND diffuses the situation. If he doesn't talk to you, then don't say anything. Only reply with the short greetings/phrases when he says something to you.

If he ever lays a hand on you though, then it's time time to get out. Your personal safety should trump all.
Reply

#24
Camfer Wrote:Sounds like you are playing the victim here. Turn the tables on him. Every time he says something anti-gay, tell him he's so obviously obsessed with gayness because he's probably a closet queen. Tell him that the more he talks about gays, the more people will think he's gay. Bullies usually run when you confront them. By being so passive, you are perpetuating the situation. You are giving him power over you. If he calls you a faggot, call him a bigoted closet queen.

As for him leaving harassing notes on your door, get a spy cam and video him doing it. Don't throw any of the notes away. Keep them all.

I also agree with this. But make sure when you confront him you never initiate any kind of physical contact.
Reply

#25
I'm worried that if your neighbour can resort to pasting rude notes on your door and passing hurting comments, he might go to the extent of harming you physically. I'm not trying to scare you, but some people can't even mind their own business and waste their time and energy focusing on such stuff.

Do you think you can afford to move out to another apartment? Maybe one that is LGBT friendly. Think about it and hopefully you can make a right decision.

One thing you can do is to ignore him. Its not easy but you can train yourself to do so. If he starts his nonsensical remarks, just have a thought in your mind that "Oh that idiot has started his nonsense but i dun give a damn about it." and ignore him.
Just think that his mouth needs to break wind because his ass has a problem. ( sorry if i sound vulgar. )
Or you could listen to your mp3 player while leaving your apartment. It might help to divert your attention. You can keep away your mp3 player after reaching outside.
As for the notes, you can safekeep them if you intend to approach a lawyer like what other members have suggested.
If you do not intend to, you can just spit on the notes and throw them away in the dustbin. That rude note is not even worth your spit man. ( Again sry for the vulgar content. )

I would like to end with a common internet phrase " There are over 7 billion people on earth. And you're going to let 1 person ruin your day? Smile "

Hope you can get this problem solved and lead a happy life. Smile
Reply

#26
A 30+ bully? Wow...

I would definately go through the law path. The fire is a death threat and his general tone is obvious racism, both of which are illegal in Denmark. I have no idea what the sentence is for such crimes though.

The problem with standing up to him is that when bigots run out of good arguments they use their fists. Or run. Or break down and cry and admit their true selves.
Reply

#27
Actually I don't worry very much about his words about burning my flat. That option sounds terrifying, but actually I know and I believe he also knows he cannot possibly burn just my flat alone and make sure other flats don't catch it as well. He wouldn't kill the whole house just because of me.

Do you know how much does a lawyer service cost? Even that one consultation without any further actions? I've only just enough money to pay for my living here and buy something to eat. And I unfortunately cannot hope to get very well paid job, because I only have high school education.

I tried to reason with him, because I want to do everything in a good way, in a grown-up way. I usually don't like to live by the rule "you harmed me, now I'll harm you". I usually never do it, and somehow I've always managed to make things better even with people I don't like, but he doesn't seem to hear me at all, it's like we're speaking in two different languages.
Reply

#28
I would seek advice from the flat owner, your local council or citizens advice. We had some trouble a while back with bad neighbours and went to the local council for help, this did help but it did take some time. Write every incident down everything he says or does, but I would not sink to his level and retaliate back. Try talking to neighbours find out what they think of him, try and get some support that way. But before trying costly legal action I would use the routes of complaints I have mentioned. Once you have such as the council on side then the police can be and will used to intervene if necessary.
Reply



Related Threads…
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Horrible Brother or is it Just Me? AlohaShannon 12 1,412 01-15-2016, 06:37 AM
Last Post: Confuzzled4
  How do you deal with homophobic neighbors? rado84 2 1,073 07-21-2015, 01:08 AM
Last Post: xfrostx
  How To Deal With Homophobic Jerks When They're Supposed To Be Your Friend Pyromancer 30 3,117 02-27-2015, 07:31 AM
Last Post: Albie
  Homophobic problem in my family Anonymous 16 1,834 01-04-2015, 10:11 PM
Last Post: Zone20222
  Homophobic dude in my class and I need to study with him- help? Anonymous 25 1,994 04-27-2014, 12:38 AM
Last Post: Arkansota

Forum Jump:


Recently Browsing
1 Guest(s)

© 2002-2024 GaySpeak.com