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How important looks should be/am I wrong here?
#11
It sounds like he is a good friend to you so instead of worrying about whether or not he is relationship material....focus and put your energy into developing the friendship.

Friendships frequently last longer and are more enduring than many relationships so it will be worth the effort. Maybe tell him that at this moment you are interested in a friendship and see what happens.

Your tastes in men can evolve as you do so who knows?...maybe something more will naturally unfold if it is meant to be in the future...
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#12
It's obviously a diffricult position to be in but I would go along with those who say that you should not string him along. I think you should tell him that you appreciate him as a friend but at the same time make it quite clear tht you are not interested in a physical relationship. He can react in two ways, either accept what you say and remain a friend or be disappointed and drift away. It would be cruel to allow him to think that there is a chance of a physical relationship when there isn't.
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#13
Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:I say go ahead, rip his heart out, jump up and down on it and while you are it laugh with maniacal glee as you do so.

He clearly needs to be crushed hard and good to kill out that compassionate nice fellow and to get him old, jaded and filled with hatred so he won't make the mistake of falling in love again.

Do him that favor, because if you are representative of about 90% of the faggots that walk on this earth, that means super shallow, super into the wrong things when it comes to people.

Wow. Is it just me, or are you just getting more and more nialistic of late? You need some dick, honey?

Anyway, to the OP. Right after I left my partner of 5 years I meet a man much as you describe. A friend threw me a birthday party and this guy was there. At the party, we spoke and I enjoyed visiting with him but I wasn't genuinely attracted to him, he just wasn't my type. Mainly we just chit-chatted about cars (since he was a mechanic and my car was needing some work).
The next morning, he arrived at my house driving a 1952 restored Ford Coupe and presented it to me as a birthday present. He said he had never met anyone like ,e before and that he wanted desperately to date me.
Friends told me I should give him a chance and that he was a really nice guy, so I agreed to date him with the condition that we take it SLOW due to my recent breakup.
3 days later, I came home from work to discover that he had broken into my appartment and gone through all of my unpacked boxes of stuff and was waiting in bed for me naked.
I gave the car back and told him to piss-off. He immediately called everyone we mutually knew and told them I had just been using him to get a new car.
Moral of the story: If you aren't feeling it, just say so from the start and avoid future drama.
~Beaux
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#14
Constructive criticism! the Op seems to be a bit self conscious of stringing this guy along, so at least lets give him credit for that! I am currently dating someone, who even thou is physically skinny built, have a funny squeaky voice, and his facial features are not the most appealing; he compensates by,

HAVE A HUGE HEART

COMMUNICATIVE

IS VERY ROMANTIC

VERY AFFECTIONATE

WISE BEYOND HIS YEARS (thou he is 8 yrs younger then me!)

VERY SENSUAL

THOUGHTFUL

ATTENTIVE

These are qualities very high on my list of what I find attractive in someone!
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#15
Saying lets be friends is like telling him he is ugly. They both hurt. Just end it. Later on after many years gone by you will look back and regret what you did.
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#16
I'm confused, OP. Your profile says you're in a monogamous relationship.

I am usually the other guy in this scenario but I learned over time not to put so much of myself out there until I'm sure there are reciprocated feelings. Your friend will learn this hard lesson too.

"I am not a pretty girl. That is not what I do." - Ani DiFranco
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#17
Beaux Wrote:Wow. Is it just me, or are you just getting more and more nialistic of late?
~Beaux

More nialistic?

No. I just let my mask slip and showed you what I really think.

Beaux Wrote:You need some dick, honey?

~Beaux

No, I actually need less pricks in my life.
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