I am at a loss of words

[SlipknotRlZZ]

I can't begin to explain how badly surprised, how disappointed and crestfallen I am. It's about you guys' replies to SavedGay's confession.

The guy was seeking forgiveness, understanding, help...and you just put him down because of what he has done so many years ago, what he's been beating himself up over for so much time. He's tried so many things to mak e up for what he did. Did you know he even tried to committ suicide?

I know he wasn't right in his attitude too, he preached his beliefs and religion, he got rude and all, but what do you expect from someone who's endured so many attacks and blows? You didn't even give him a chance, in the beginning. You don't know what his reasons for doing this was, you don't know anything.

Maybe I am seeing this wrong, maybe I'm not. I just...I never expected to see such reactions from you, to something like this. I know I have no right to tell you how to act, what to say, and it's not what I am doing. I just wanted to express my feelings on this.

What if a lurking teen who is looking for acceptance and support to come out read that thread and the responses? He'd see so much cruelty and harshness even from the gay communitty. What would that do to his spirit? Just the other day another 14 year old committed suicide.

I can't believe this. I think I will honestly have to rethink what I post on here. We all have done things we're ashamed of, and feel deep regret now. We all need support. What if I can't get that support here?

Once again, I really can't believe I'm making this thread.

[Almac]

SlipknotRlZZ quoting Oscar Wilde "I am not young enough to know everything.!" Saying that, child abuse on the whole does not go down very well with the general public. Why do you think child abusers go under cover? SlipknotRlZZ try listening to children who were abused I can assure you, you would think twice about your posting?

[SlipknotRlZZ]

Almac, I am not saying what the guy did is right, nor am I supporting him. My point is that most people didn't even give him a chance.

[DRIMO]

Which is why I rarely post in serious/controversial topics.

[Genersis]

You're right Ryan, we should give him a chance, and we did.

While the first few replies weren't helpful to SavedGay, they weren't attacking him. They simply asked why he would do such a thing, and that they can't sympathise with what he did.

It's how SavedGay reacted to this that i think has caused offence.
Calling any member a Smart ass, idiot, Westboro baptist is simply uncalled for.
So what little sympathy we had for him was quickly lost.

Well.
This is how i feel about the situation anyway.

[East]

Ryan...I cannot even begin to tell you about the damage I have seen and experienced personally in my life due to pedophiles. If you remember...there was one here before and I tried to understand.....in the end I did not achieve any understanding but I was open to listening and civil to the guy.

The dealbreaker here was the Jesus crap. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many molesters hide behind Jesus...often while molesting their victims. The guy who molested my mom was a preacher and I paid for that every fucking day of my life...so did all of my brothers. One is schizophrenic...one is in prison...one shot himself.... my mother was a nightmare due to her molester and it has taken me 54 years to even begin to forgive her. The damage they do is almost immeasurable. A fucking pedophile is going to come in here and tell me I am "sinning" because of who I am???? OMFG...I don;t' let anyone define God for me...it is intensely personal.

You think I was being unfair? Ask his son how unfair I was being.

[Aester]

I might am very ignorant about pedophilia, but i must agree with SlipKnot that people judged it very hard. All i could see was that he really regretted it

[pellaz]

everyone has their belief systems, it a dorky clinical statement but they do.

once i realized i was gay i did what i thought was right. hit reset, divorced the lady.
the X and I are still friends and we do more together than before with out the drama + arguments.
i was functional in my straight relationship

i felt SavedGay was hanging his regret on the religion thingy.

[marshlander]

...I cannot even begin to tell you about the damage I have seen and experienced personally in my life due to pedophiles.

... The dealbreaker here was the Jesus crap. SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many molesters hide behind Jesus ... The damage they do is almost immeasurable. A fucking pedophile is going to come in here and tell me I am "sinning" because of who I am???? OMFG...I don;t' let anyone define God for me...it is intensely personal.

You think I was being unfair? Ask his son how unfair I was being.

East, there are times when I just want to give you the biggest hug - purely platonically, of course

[jimcrackcorn]

The man said he deeply regretted what he had done and was unstable during that period of his life. I accept that at face-value and will be fair to him and hope he and his family can some day reach an amicable relationship with one another.

I'm sure SavedGay has many redeemable qualities, one only has to read his post to realize he felt terrible about what he had done and understands he must live with it the rest of his life.

His angry tone started when he felt he was being attacked for honestly confessing something that he had done in his past and regretted. I'm sure his feelings were hurt and he lashed out at those who he perceived were targeting him.

Just my two cents, feel free to bite my head off, but please be gentle - or I'll take my marbles and go home and play by myself mile: