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I can't get over my ex dumping me I still love him
#11
When people are taken from us we end up having bigger issues with letting them go, then when we get fed up and kick their happy ass to the curb...

In a way your ex got taken from you with this sort of stuff, its not like you got fedup with him first.

So its going to take longer to heal.

Also you have the other attending issues, such as working through the betrayal, which will slow the whole grieving process.

Understand that what spark you carry for him will never really go out. I still carry a minor flame for #1 (he went to prison, so was taken) #2 I carry a small (very small) spark for (abuser, ended up breaking me in many ways).

And both of those are over 20 years ago.

So how a relationship ends will impact the long course of how you end up feeling. You will feel something, and you still will have fond memories, and distance and times does tend us to gloss over the bad and paint better pictures of people.

The strong pang of hurt you have now will diminish, and you will stop feeling it most of the time. Occasionally, and as the years march forward, you will feel it farther and fewer between.

Give it time, cry, scream - whatever makes it feel better for short periods of time. You will heal.
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