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I'm bisexual and looking to date girls again
#11
I was married to a woman for 20 years. 3 years after divorce I was out with a boyfriend. Now I have just started dating a woman. I am definitely keeping my friends guessing! Many of them assumed I was actually gay when I suddenly had a boyfriend a year ago. The gay friends I've made often have the hardest time accepting that I'm bi, expecting it's a "stepping stone" as you mentioned, Drew.

For me it's all about the person. I can love a man or a woman if they have qualities that attract me and we have enough in common. I'm very up front about that with people. I told this woman on our first date that I'm bi. She knows my ex bf, so I didn't want her hearing it from anyone else. She is straight and has never been with a bi guy, but she seems fine with it.

All I can say is be yourself, be comfortable with who you are and the rest will follow.
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#12
Drew Wrote:Folks that know me know that I originally came out as bisexual in 2006. It's often said that many young non-heterosexuals often do this as well. It's often considered the "stepping-stone" to fulling coming out of the closet as a gay/lesbian individual.

And for a while, I thought that was supposed to happen to me. And I tried wearing the "pure gay" label for years, but every now and again I'd run into a beautiful young woman who'd get my heart racing and make me act like a befuddled adolescent all over again.

"What's going on, you're gay. dammit, you're not supposed to think about girls that way!" I'd tell myself.

I've always felt out of place in both the straight and gay world, but whenever I apply to myself (or even hear the word) "bisexual", it just fits like a glove.

But I've been apprehensive about being more open about it due to misconceptions and the various shades of gray there are to being bi. But I also don't want to limit myself, either.

If you're bi, how do you go about telling someone you're interested in that that is how you identify? How does a guy tell a girl he's interested in that, yeah, he's been primarily gay-identified for the past 7 years but he's open to being in hetero relationship? Where does one meet bi-friendly women? Should I date women who also identify as bi?

For me, both men and women are beautiful. I'm still not 100% sure which relationship dynamic works best for me, but something tells me gender will be irrelevant at the end of the day. I want to explore this more, but not sure how to get things off the ground.

Thanks for any advice or opinions ahead of time!

If yer comfortable with it, talk to yer gal about it, just be upfront from the start, as long as you trust her confidentiality, if not, it (I dont feel) is anyones business who I dated prior, 1 thing might be of concern is she might worry you might suddenly go back to wanting to date men, whoever you date, whatever gender, ya gotta gain their trust
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