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I really need help !!
#1
Hello everybody !!
I’m LOST and I really need your help/ advices if it’s possible!
So here goes my story:
I’m a straight girl but all my guy friends are gay and I don’t even have any straight friends around me anymore. But now I’m in love with one of my gay friends and it never happened before and yeah i know many girls actually fall in love with their gay friends but this is different !! The strange thing about it is that he’s bisexual and it makes me hope and it kills me.
He went out with girls since we was 16 and he had long relationships with girls ( 2 or 3 years relationships) until 4 years ago he kind of turned “ gay “ and now he’s 25 years old.
His longest relationship with a girl was about 3 years and she was even pregnant but of course they didn’t keep the baby because they were both young back then.
A year ago he used to live with his girl- best friend during a year and he was very attached to her though she was in love with him but nothing sexual happened between them though they slept together in the same bed for a year except that they sometimes kiss when they are drunk and during that time he didn't even sleep with any guy. And their story ended there.
When we talked about this unhealthy relationship between him and his best friend, he told me something like “I assumed my gay sexuality few years ago and many people in town know that, it’s difficult for me to re-assume as a straight person” – which I find very strange as answer. He indeed is the type of guy who doesn't usually face the problems or whatever but he chooses to run away.
He has been telling me that he’s bi and he doesn't see himself in his forties with a man but more likely with a woman and he wants children. He doesn’t kiss his ex bfs or show his sexual orientation in public, never.
He used to have sex with other guys during these 2 3 years and by January (5 moths ago) he slept with a girl, just a ONS but even so, it was a girl.
He even told me that he was fed up and he told himself that he won’t go out with men in 2011 anymore but eventually he did go out with some guys.
Now I fell in love with him, in a strange way. I don’t know what to do and I don’t know what he wants from me trying to say that he’s kinda into woman more than man, that he’s so very bisexual etc.
We met not very long ago and we directly became very good friends, we see each other almost everyday. He calls me every morning when he wakes up/ after work and we text each other or call each other every night to say g9. He started to say things like I love you but yeah friends do say that to friends too and coming from a gay/bi friend it became less " important", I guess ? ( I mean " important" in another way than just friends)
I understand and I get along very well with gay people and they adore me too. But now I'm too confused
What should I do ? Should I tell him how I feel ? ( Btw I know he’s been seeing some guy lately ). If he's bi and if he could turn straight to be with me and of course not to cheat on me with other guys, then his homosexual past doesn't bother me.
Meanwhile I'm afraid if I actually talk to him, he'll run away instead of facing it
Or should I just be friends with him ? – I’m also afraid of getting myself hurt by hoping when i'm with him and next to him as a " friend"
Please somebody help me out!!! I need your advice !!!!!
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#2
Assuming he can be honest with you I can't see any other way to deal with this other than to talk to him. If he can't bring himself to be honest with you do you think you would want the problems an attempted relationship would bring?

Best wishes
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#3
Hi Chloe, welcome to the forum Confusedmile:

I think you need to talk with him about this. If you don't, and he's not forthcoming in making a move, this situation will just drag on and on for you.
Reading between the lines, it seems to me that he may just see you as a good friend; he appears to have no reservations about approaching folk he's interested in, but I don't know the guy, these are just my thoughts anyway.
Hope things work themselves out for you.
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