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I think I need HELP
#1
I've been drinking tonight and I want to text this guy I've been seeing
Problem is that he is really in to me but he is into just casual sex and I 'm looking for a relationship with him. O.K I already txt him tonight and it was cool. he was very nice in his reply. well i'm pretty hot, I'm Italian, I work out 4 days a week. dark eye brows and lashes. I have men and a lot of women hit on me everytime I go out clubbing. ANYWAY This guy is a bartender at 2 gay clubs and he moves to fast for me. He wants to get down right away and I'm not like that. (but I really think he's dreamy) A relationship is what I'm looking for. I know he thinks I'm Hot, (Everyone does) We still talk but, Well, I kinda know what It is, but I won't say it here. (personal) I should just let it go,,---Right??
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#2
Uh, yeah. If you want a relationship and he's made it clear that he doesn't, then all you're doing is setting yourself up for a good deal of drama in your life and, ultimately, setting yourself up to get hurt.
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#3
JimmyEcho Wrote:I should just let it go,,---Right??
Depends. You want a relationship, but can you allow yourself a more casual encounter while you are waiting?
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#4
I wouldn't do anything with him given the differences in what you want from each other, but I'm also 20, I don't know how older guys work or how willing they are to change their minds.
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#5
You already know he's only into casual sex, then don't make it a drama or you'll get hurt eventually, trust me.
Have fun there Big Grin
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#6
Agree with a lot of the advice already given. I constantly see people hanging onto those who aren't into them and it almost always ends up with a broken heart. You should want to be with someone who wants to be with you.
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#7
If you're hoping he would change later,don't.
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#8
Save yourself worse grief in the future and take the advice everyone (!) gave you.
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#9
Best to move on and try to someone who can give you what you truly want and need.
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#10
OK, you said it, you've been drinking. So when you sober up, look at it for what it is. A hook-up. Nothing wrong with that if both parties are clear on it --- but you have feelings for him. This is not just a philosophical difference between relationship and hook-up, you have feelings for the guy.
So if you hook up with him just for sex, you're going to be wanting more. And ehn you don't get more, it's going to lead to a lot of self-negativity. We always blame ourselves...he'd want more if only I were more worthy...
The smart thing would be to walk away. I remember when my sister was in high school, she spent months moping after this guy who just wanted an easy lay - he treated her like a convenience - I got so pissed I finally ended up beating him up...not my finest moment lol...
But seriously, you're worth more than this.
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