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If your parents can't accept your sexual orientation...
#1
UltraDude's ex Wrote:...this is going to sound really cynical and controversial but the fact that you're related by blood to somebody does not make you obligated to follow them. If they can't accept you for who you are then they aren't worth your time. The end. ESPECALLY if they're anti-gay.

That is one powerful thing my ex said and that was posted on another forum back in January. It was on response to someone who had a strained relationship with his parents. My ex said something to me before that quote, but it is irrelevant.

I wholeheartedly agree with him. I am not obligated to follow my damn parents. They're old-school... I keep my sexuality to myself most of the time... I have told them that I'm gay, they didn't believe me... so yeah, I'm not going to follow them at all.

Here's the question... do you feel obligated to follow what your parent's say about your sexuality?
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#2
UltraDude Wrote:Here's the question... do you feel obligated to follow what your parent's say about your sexuality?

I think to be honest about the own sexuality is a good thing.... but a least the own sexuality is the own thing of each individual ..... and if parents only not want to believe things they know it is their really own thing and not longer your Problem
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#3
nope. i don't think anyone should feel obligated to whatever their parents want them to be as far as sexuality is concern.
fortunately, my parents were too busy enough to find ways how to feed us (third world country, you know the rest) to actually bother about my sexuality. even up to now, i haven't came out yet and i don't feel the need to anyway. at least as of the moment. God knows we have too much problem going on inside our family than my homosexuality.
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#4
Agree....
You will never (hopefully) live Your life with your parents.... You will find your own life, your love...
We all have to learn to live by ourselves. Sometimes without support of our families or friends, who cannot accept you. But it is always their loss. Find Your way to be happy.
We will come this point .... sooner or later!
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#5
if my mother never accepted my sexuality id reply with

Well you know what your purpose in my life was??? Just to give birth to me... If my father doesnt accept it id reply with

Your nothing more than a sperm donor anyhow so what effect do you really think you have on my life???

I would be just as cruel to them
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#6
I would think that if they couldn't accept me for being gay then they were not good parents or really loved me at all,I wouldn't want to have anything more to do with them,I understand that some need time to get to understand it and thats ok but not ages.
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#7
I was never in the least curious about the sexuality of my parents. Like many kids I guess I preferred not to think about it at all. I think they were curious about me, but never made it an issue. They thought it wasn't one when I got married and fathered children. My father revisited that period of curiosity when he noticed how much I was struggling in my marriage relationship.

My only concern for my own children is that they find happiness with someone who treats them well. PA's mother wrote to me on a few occasions to thank me for making her son happy. I know that sense of relief.
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#8
marshlander Wrote:I was never in the least curious about the sexuality of my parents.

I try to avoid thinking about how I came into the world, I find it rather off-putting.
Fred

Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
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#9
luckily I sprouted from the ground...

Although in my view. I have my life, my parents have theirs. So they can choose to do what they want, and I'll choose to do what I want. I'll always love them due to them being my parents and they've done a great job raiseing me Smile

My mum would accept me no matter what... she's said it many times. Though I dought its a hint that she knows O_O could be but meh... My dad is homophobic and has said it aswell. There was a family argueing on jeremy kyle because the son was gay. My dad complained how it was disgraceful they were acting this way and went on to say "as long as there happy" etc.. etc.. I think he'd have a hard time takeing it. (For reason I'll not get into)

so yea Tongue I don't care...
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#10
UltraDude Wrote:That is one powerful thing my ex said and that was posted on another forum back in January. It was on response to someone who had a strained relationship with his parents. My ex said something to me before that quote, but it is irrelevant.

I wholeheartedly agree with him. I am not obligated to follow my damn parents. They're old-school... I keep my sexuality to myself most of the time... I have told them that I'm gay, they didn't believe me... so yeah, I'm not going to follow them at all.

Here's the question... do you feel obligated to follow what your parent's say about your sexuality?



If your parents can't accept who you are...they have a problem and it really isn't yours even thought hey will insist that is IS your problem. They dont' even love you if they only love who you had to pretend to be and they use their conditional love and acceptance as a bargaining chip. Furthermore if you pretend they do love you when they don't it will kill your self worth and f*ck with your mind. I used to get enraged so much went I heard my bar customers talking about what they went through that I will rarely comment here when the "coming out" topic comes up because I think I am too hardcore...but since this isn't actually a coming out person seeking counsel thread I will comment:biggrin:

I have a problem accepting homophobic controlling a**holes who use a child's need for acceptance and love to control them...it is abuse. Unfortunately dogma and the church have conditioned us to accept this crap. In my opinion...they should be begging their child for forgiveness if the relationship is strained because you had the nerve to be who you are. I really hate that we are so conditioned by society and the church with shame and guilt and fear that we allow our parents to destroy our spirit because they are ignorant. There is plenty of information out there...ignorance is a choice. Being gay is not.

The fact that so many parents who belittle and abandon their children because they are gay do so "in the name of God" proves to me that religion is basically evil.
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