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Need a little help "letting go" of something
#11
you can't go back to feeling nothing out of something that is already there, unless you figure it out why you're feeling it in the first place.

personally, i wouldn't have been pissed off at such an exchange anyway, and i would have handled it differently.

unless i was attracted to him. then, his reaction would have stung like that. guys i'm not attracted to don't have an effect on me.
''Do I look civilized to you?''
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#12
WOW... some of these replies are totally off.

I don't know the man but I believe he may be gay. That's just my impression of him.

Regardless of his sexuality, I don't find him AT ALL attractive. Skinny legs, fat upper body. Not my type.

Suggesting I "let go and move on"... YES... that is the question I asked: HOW DO YOU DO THAT?

As to why I feel this way: He was unnecessarily rude. Simple as that. If he didn't want to talk, that's all he had to say. I would have happily left him alone. (I was not in his personal space either, there was at least six feet between us.) But to start going off on things (... for example, one of the things he said is, "It's bad enough that I have to...."... and I didn't understand what he said after those words. I have tinnitus so my hearing is far from perfect. The point is, asking me to leave him alone in itself would have been totally fine with me. That's not what he did. He started haranguing and making whatever his issues were "my fault." Yes. He was obviously having a bad day. Yes, obviously I said something at a bad time. I get that. That wasn't my question.

Whatever. Maybe I'll just put super glue on his lock next time I see him head for the shower.
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#13
MikeW Wrote:Whatever. Maybe I'll just put super glue on his lock next time I see him head for the shower.

Or how about Bengay on his underwear....
"I’m not expecting to grow flowers in a desert, but I can live and breathe and see the sun in wintertime"
Check out my stuff!
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#14
axle2152 Wrote:Or how about Bengay on his underwear....

Ewww... not getting near his undies, thanks. :eek:
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#15
MikeW Wrote:Ewww... not getting near his undies, thanks. :eek:

lol well idk about that guy but I bring a clean set of clothes to change into when I go to leave the gym.
"I’m not expecting to grow flowers in a desert, but I can live and breathe and see the sun in wintertime"
Check out my stuff!
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#16
Jesus Christ Mike just ignore the guy and focus on something else. For instance, take out all this piss on your workout. That'll help.
[Image: 05onfire1_xp-jumbo-v2.jpg?quality=90&auto=webp]
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#17
I wish I have advise to offer, but I am the same way you are--I carry confrontations around with me....
Best Wishes,
~Beaux
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#18
Hi Mike! Long time no "see".....

I have been where you are.,..not at the gym..but at the nightclub..and I initially had the same reaction as you..even to the point of obsession...but it pissed me off that not only were they an assholes..they took up too much of my time....

So I found a solution that worked way better than I thought it might....

The thing is.....I would have what I called bitchy queens who were nice or "OK" and then went off on me for pretty much any reason one day...and then they would be nice the next time. Well.....I didn't want to talk to THEM again for the most part ...and I didn't want to be bitter which I think is worse than death....

So..everytime it happened after I decided ENOUGH..I went up and introduced myself to two new people I had never met just to be friendly.....and I found it no longer mattered what some asshole did to me.....

I don't know if it is a solution that would work for you....but if you can do it..a simple "HI" or nod to anyone you don't know might just do the trick and get him out of your train of thought....
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#19
East Wrote:...So..everytime it happened after I decided ENOUGH..I went up and introduced myself to two new people I had never met just to be friendly.....and I found it no longer mattered what some asshole did to me.....

I don't know if it is a solution that would work for you....but if you can do it..a simple "HI" or nod to anyone you don't know might just do the trick and get him out of your train of thought....
I like that. Not sure if I could actually put that in practice but its a good plan. I'm socially awkward. It's very difficult for me to feel comfortable enough to just say "hi" or smile at someone... especially at the gym. Not just there though. I really do keep to myself for the most part. It was interesting that the day this happened, I'd had a very nice chat with one of the regulars... a 20 something guy.... very much a body builder. I'd asked him a question and he was very helpful. So that's why I was in a 'well lets make a friend' mood.

TODAY the [edit: rude] guy was there (as he almost always is) and as I was getting ready to leave he walked by me and just GLARED at me through his glasses... as if he expected me to say something. I'm like WTF dude? I didn't say a word, just ignored him. Guy has issues obviously so I'm just staying away from him.
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#20
I understand Mike...my husband is the same way.....

I am talkative to strangers and he is socially awkward...and it is one of the most endearing qualities about him.

BTW...that guy at the gym sounds like a real asswipe.
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