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Pain reliever
#1
A man went to the dental surgeon to have a tooth pulled. The dentist pulled out a freezing needle to numb the area.

"No way! No needles! I hate needles," the patient shouted.

The dentist started to hook up the laughing gas and the man again objected.

"I can't do the gas thing!” the man protested. “The thought of having a gas mask on is suffocating to me!"

The dentist then asked if the man had any objection to taking a pill.

"No," the patient said. "I am fine with pills."

The dentist said, "Here is a Viagra tablet."

The patient replied: "Wow! I didn't know Viagra works as a pain pill!"

Dentist

"It doesn't," said the dentist, "but it will give you something to hold onto when I pull out your tooth."
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#2
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