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I want to exit the stage of life
#21
so I made it through another day, I think the most annoying thing out of all this mood swings and anxiety and depression is the low energy I experience through it. I feel like I can barely walk for an hour without feeling completely drained. Sad
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#22
Low energy is common... The right 'tricks' to taking the sting out of it is to aim for at lead 8 hours of sleep on a very regular schedule, eat well balanced food and limit caffeine consumption.

That latter is difficult because you want to get a coffee IV drip, or energy drink, or coke or cocaine, or crank or crystal or an 8-ball....

I would suggest you ask your doctor for advice for energy... it is possible you have some sort diet deficiency going on and only need multi-vitamins or such.

I went for years thinking that I was just tired because I was 'sad' in the winter and hella over the top manic in summer... No came to find out that a majority of my tiredness was anemia... Iron deficiency. Which getting b-12 shots and doses of iron did lead to a lot more energy since my blood was able to carry more oxygen.

Which leads to meditation and breathing exercises. Boosting your oxygen levels may actually give you boosts to your energy. you may be sighing a lot.... idK - if you are it may not be just because you are anxious/depressed but because you are not breathing properly (deeply, slowly, efficiently).

Taking a break every 4 hours of the day to focus 5 minutes on your breathing, your posture and actuallly sucking up a lot of air (thus oxygen) may improve things.

There are sites out there: https://www.google.com/#q=deep+breathing+for+depression Anxiety and depression....
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#23
I have gone through it and still i am, in a way.

Here is what i have done, to get myself together and live Smile....

1. Get Busy doing what i love.... run marathon, do workouts..... dont care if you cant do it initially..... keep trying....
2. Adopt healthier food....
3. Breath- Yoga-Meditate.....
4. Look at these workouts take up a challenge http://neilarey.com/programs.html
5. For Music soothes my soul...... i am learning Guitar and Ukulele
6. Go on a trek....... discover more about yourself .....

My friend, there are lot more beautiful things in this world.... that needs to be experienced...

I take ayurvedic medicine Ashwagandha for healthier mental attitude and Himalaya Mentat to curb anxiety.....

I read from your posts that you are taking some professional help....... please do continue that... but also do your own research on internet and understand your situation....

But to stop this crazy chain-reaction of depression. you got to understand
"We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us."

Breath-Eat-Sleep....... Live your life..... More you expect from Life.... more you will get stressed....

Have a Wonderful Day Big Grin


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#24
I'm not sure if I have the answer to help, but just want to say:

Bighug
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#25
I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time, and feeling this way. I don't know exactly what you're going through, but I've had my own bouts of depression and disparity, and know what it's like to feel helpless, and at the mercy of a seemingly-cruel universe. Don't give up. While it may not feel like it now, your life is too valuable and important to forfeit. Get some help from someone you are comfortable talking to. It's important that you let those who love you know what you're thinking about. You don't have to shoulder this burden alone, and people WILL help you, if you let them.

If you don't have anyone at home you can talk to, talk to us here in the board. I'm sure I speak for many here when I say you are welcome to PM me to talk privately if you need to talk. Again, you just need to ask for help.

If it comes to the worst, and you find yourself ready to take that awful, final action, STOP and think of the people who love you, and what this will do to them. Despite what you may believe, you are loved and your choice will destroy the people who love you. You won't be around to witness the consequences of your actions, but you've got to know you don't live in an isolated bubble. If for no other reason than to spare them the agony of losing you, don't do it.

I sincerely hope you seek out and get the help you need. There's no shame in what you're going through. Best of luck, my friend.
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#26
I have no respect for a therapist who would "quit" his practice without connecting his clients to other therapists! If he did not ensure you were satisfactorily transitioned he is in direct violation of his licensure code or ethics. Hope he's out of business, otherwise; hope you won't let him get away with doing that to anyone else!

We all have varying degrees of "disorder" in our brain chemistry. Some from time to time, some only situationally and some by inheritance more serious than others. A good psychiatrist will work with whatever combination of synthetic and or naturals chemicals are necessary to find better balance and then work to keep as much balance over time as can be achieved. That said, without the psychotherapy the meds will never suffice and will have to be changed and titrated for life. Learning recovery skills while using meds and having a doc who works over the years to assist with transitions is the best science has to offer for real, longitudinal wellness recovery. Best wishes as you move forward!! Remybussi
Heart  Life's too short to miss an opportunity to show your love and affection!  Heart
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#27
Yesterday I was feeling so bad.... I thought to myself I had two choices.... do I go through with ending my life... or do I seek help.... I had a knife in my hand, do I stab myself ? I thought for a second it would relieve the pain. Then I thought. Why would I do that when I really just want this pain to end, and not my life. So I called the crisis hotline at 1 in the morning and she talked with me for half an hour and I felt a lot better about things. I never thought I would actually make that call in my life. I finally admitted, to someone, by voice, what I ve been truly feeling. I ve never done that before. It was refreshing.

I ve been feeling a bit better since trying to keep myself busy after my work hours and on Monday I will get my affairs in order to try and talk to a physiatrist as soon as possible, but still keep calm. Sometimes I get the feeling like I need help NOW and that i CANT take the pain anymore, but the key is how I will deal with this feeling from now on. Will I let it cripple me or will it become my strength? Time will tell. I will get out of this and be happy again, one day at a time...
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#28
NayNay Wrote:I finally admitted, to someone, by voice, what I ve been truly feeling. I ve never done that before. It was refreshing.

Such a cool share! Thanks Smile
The more you do that the more empowering it is! Who knows, you may find yourself helping someone else turn things around in a better direction!

HOPE is Honesty, Openness, Patience & Effort dear! Yllove
Heart  Life's too short to miss an opportunity to show your love and affection!  Heart
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