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The Juggler
#1
A Michigan State trooper pulled a car over on US 23 about 2 miles north of the Michigan/Ohio State line. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Ft. Wayne , IN to do a show at the Shrine Circus. He didn't want to be late.

The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn't give him a ticket. He told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn't have anything to juggle. The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him.

While the man was juggling, a car pulled in behind the patrol car. A drunken good old boy from Michigan got out, watched the performance, then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and got in. The trooper observed him and went over to the patrol car, opened the door asking the drunk what he thought he was doing.

The drunk replied, 'You might as well take my ass to jail, cause there ain't no way I can pass that test.'
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#2
This got a huge laugh from my BF (who happens to be a state trooper lol) -
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#3
Good one! *laughing*
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#4
Here's one for you, Londoner:
'A Wisconsin senior citizen drove his brand new
Corvette convertible out of a Milwaukee dealership.

Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph,
enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.

'Amazing,' he thought as he flew down I-94 towards
Madison, pushing the pedal even more.
Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a State
Patrol car behind him, blue and red lights flashing.
He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120.

Suddenly he thought, 'What am I doing? I'm too old
for this,' and pulled over to await the Trooper 's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the Trooper walked up to
the Corvette, looked at his watch and said,
'Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is
Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding
that I've never heard before, I'll let you go.'

The old gentleman paused. Then said, 'Years ago,
my wife ran off with a Wisconsin State Trooper.
I thought you were bringing her back.'
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#5
Both are good.
Smile
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