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Trouble with Men/Sex
#11
megumidesu Wrote:In fact , being totally in the moment and not giving a crap whether you'll have an orgasm or not makes sex a lot better for many people...

This does sound very appealing. Suddenly I envy you for not having orgasms. Life's so unfair Sad
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#12
To be blunt here...........if you are a "bottom", then there are PLENTY of "tops" out there who couldn't care less if you get hard or orgasm.

I've had two or three BF's who could not get hard or orgasm. That did not stop me from liking the people they are, and it did not stop me from pounding them in bed either.
Wink
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#13
I prefer sex inside of the confines of relationship. I did try two one night stands after 4 failed relationships trying to scratch one itch without all of the messy love and relationship crap.... Whilst able to 'get off' those experiences were not wholly satisfying and actually left me feeling worse than before hand. I got more satisfaction from masturbation.....

Sex and intimacy are not just about pleasure and lust, there is a lot of other deeper connecting emotions that sex with a partner accomplishes.

I did the whole 12 years of no sex in a relationship. That ain't gonna happen ever again.

So no... No sex means no relationship.

Uncertain about the ability to ejaculate, but you should be able to experience the sensation of orgasm. Prepubescent boys are able to experience orgasm while they still produce no semen.

Men who have been snipped (vasectomy) are still able to orgasm and even produce fluids which are from the other organs and glands that all work together with the testes. Precum (preseminal fluid, or Cowper's fluid) comes from the Cowper's Gland not from the testes... Not only does a man produce some during sex, but also a bit comes out mixed with the seminal fluids.

There is a difference between orgasm and ejaculation: https://www.google.com/#q=difference+bet...jaculation plenty of sites discuss this.

If you are unable to reach orgasm it may not be tied in with the ability to ejaculate.

Quote:I've never had a diagnosis, though I'm certain the reason I don't orgasm is because my testicles were in my body rather than in my scrotum until I was about 15. And I appreciate the insight. It does help with confidence. Confusedmile:

I strongly suggest you talk to your doctor about your abilities here. Never know there may be a simple fix, or it may be a symptom of some other underlying condition that if left untreated will shorten your life.
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#14
Cuddly Wrote:This does sound very appealing. Suddenly I envy you for not having orgasms. Life's so unfair Sad

I do have orgasms. But when I have sex that's not what we focus on. If I don't have one neither of us feel bad about it because the sex itself was awesome anyway Smile
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#15
RicardoRacoon Wrote:There are a lot of people who have no issue having sex with someone they hardly know. That's okay but that's not me. I can be aroused by persistent, charming men but the idea of actually having sex with them disturbs me. The only time I feel comfortable having sex is if I'm in a committed relationship with them.

I don't produce sperm nor orgasm though I do value and want sex if it's with someone I trust and am infatuated with. I think men are turned off when they learn I don't orgasm and it makes it hard for me to open up to them. I'm literally the only person I've ever heard of that doesn't orgasm and as silly as it sounds, I think it's holding me back.

What I want to know is if you guys would be comfortable with spending the rest of your life with a man if you knew he couldn't orgasm. Honestly.

I would do it. After all, no orgasm = no refractory period. That's a plus, isn't it?
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#16
ive never heard about such a thing and dont you want to get help, as much as sex can be an enjoyable experience without it as somebody mentioned, some people will actually slow down so as not to finish too early, my ex did this and would go on forever and i pretty much decide when he finishes not him but im just wondering how much feeling you have down there?
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#17
Personally, it would be a little frustrating. I have been able to perform with strangers and with most of my exes. Sadly, I couldn't really with one of my exes, and it was frustrating for the both of us. If I really liked a person and they couldn't perform it would put a strain on the relationship. I would feel as if I was undesirable to my partner.
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#18
missourigaymer Wrote:Personally, it would be a little frustrating. I have been able to perform with strangers and with most of my exes. Sadly, I couldn't really with one of my exes, and it was frustrating for the both of us. If I really liked a person and they couldn't perform it would put a strain on the relationship. I would feel as if I was undesirable to my partner.

um hopefully you were still dating at that point
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#19
If you cannot orgasm, there are possibly medical answers. If it's lack of hardness, there are pills like viagra. If it's intense and painful sensitivity, there are numbing creams. If it's insecurity with having hook ups, by all means DO NOT have hook ups.

Issues like this are probably a lot more common than you think. So for starters, I recommend letting go of the stress and perceived inadequacy that is probably coming with your issues --- you'll feel better, and stress takes away from relationships.

Lastly, if all else fails, it is possible to keep a relationship without a lot of sex. It narrows your options a bit BUT EVERYONE HAS A TYPE AND HAS THEIR OPTIONS NARROWED ANYWAY. Do NOT get caught up on this in such a way as you give up and totally shut down. You may even consider that just because YOU can't orgasim, does not mean that you can't make a partner do what you cannot...
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#20
It wouldn't bug me at all. I love my boyfriend with my all, and if he couldn't get off, then so be it.
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