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after break sadness
#1
alright so im going to describe this the best way i can. my bf gets upset pretty easily, and about two weeks ago i started to not pick him up in the morning for school bc well im tired. he can easily take the bus. anyway he gets all upset over this and tells me that were on break. so the break lasted about a week. wile we were on break he gave another guy head and the other guy gave him head. he did it bc he was depressed. it wasn't easy accepting that when he told me about this. so i forgave him. and now the break is over but hes still sad. he wont even kiss me yet bc he says it seem awkward. ive tried cheering him up. today i bought him flowers and he told me it made him feel bad about him self. so i really just need to know what to do. i know i still need to give him time and space but its driving me insane. i almost breakdown every night knowing that hes still upset. i just want him happy again. one thing that im worried about is prom. its on Friday. im worried that this problem is going to ruin our prom. :'( anyone with any help im begging you please help me. thanks
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#2
Uh hmm wow thats a conundrum :/ Hmm the sheer facts hes feeling so guilty over it seems to signal to me either he might considering leaving you or he just doesn't believe you :/
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#3
what would he not belive of me?
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#4
i mean he still says he loves me
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#5
Sorry to read about your problems. Some relationships seem to get awfully complicated. It could be that he is just being difficult, but from your description he could also be mildly depressed. I'm not sure there's much you can do about either apart from let him know you care and offer to go with him to the doctor's. Not knowing any more than you've said I'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he isn't just trying to make you do the breaking up but I suppose it has to be a possibility.

Best wishes anyway.
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#6
@marshlander thank you. im hopping he wont leave me. he is saying that he needs time and space so ive been givving it to him. i guess if it continues ill have to bring him to a doctor. he still says he loves me at least
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#7
not sure my last post worked anyway i said to marshlander that my bf has been saying he needs space and time so ive been giving it to him. i just could not bear losing him. i guess if it continues well have to see a doctor like you said
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#8
so here's a question for everybody. would that be considered cheating if it was on a break?
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#9
Yes of course "needing space". Sadly that is often code for "I want to break up with you but I don't want you to think I'm a complete arsehole, so let's make it sound like I haven't got this all worked out already."

Sure it's going to hurt like hell, but you will survive and true to the cliché you'll probably end up stronger for it. Naturally if he is fretting about how to end the relationship he is going to come across as distant and distracted verging on the depressed.

I hope I'm wrong.
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#10
Here's my question... was it circumstancial that you guys were on break? Or did he have an interest in this guy before and had been wanting a break so they could fool around? I don't know if it can be considered cheating since on break but to have done it so soon, I know how that can hurt and feel so you have every right to have been bothered by it and forgive, even if he felt he didn't need forgiven you still needed to do so for you.

Either way, it sounds like your boyfriend has some issues to get worked out. To break up over the ride/bus thing seems like something so minor and selfish, from my perspective though maybe there was more to it. The flowers was a nice touch and hopefully he'll want to kiss you soon. Is he a senior? A part of me wonders if he's getting sad/scared about leaving and if he's letting that affect other stuff. Are you guys going with any friends to the prom? It might be best for him to have it not be put up as some big romantic night, even if that's what you had wanted, but instead to have it be more of a low-key night to just have fun with friends (including you) and forget about problems for a night.

I don't know... like you said even though it's hard some time and space while also giving support is good, but to be ready by prom... sometimes people get in funks and we can't control how long they'll last. But I definitely am hoping you he'll be ready to have a good time Friday night for your sake
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