06-25-2016, 04:28 PM
I don't even know which subforum should I write this post but well, I guess this one will do.
I met my 1st BF several days ago in my friend's wedding reception. He's walking around arms to arms with some pretty girl that I believe is his current lover, not like I feel jealous because I no longer have anything towards him. A lot of things happened in the past between us, bitter-sweet memories. Long story short, I hurt him, real bad -I'm a closeted bi back then while he was very carefree about his sexuality so I can't stand him and it ultimately led our relationship to an end- and we lost contact ever since (he also blocked my number and all my social media accounts). Here I thought I can finally get things right, show him how sorry I am for what I've done, but he didn't even want to look at me. I called for him several times, I even came to him when her girlfriend's busy with other girls in the reception, he brushed me off with a smile. I don't know how much he's hurting because of me, looking at how he acted around me made me loathe myself even more. Well, he might never forgive me and I'm ready to take this as my punishment, still, I wish him happiness, I want him to be happy no matter who he's with, and hoping he'll never fall to someone like my past self ever again.
I met my 1st BF several days ago in my friend's wedding reception. He's walking around arms to arms with some pretty girl that I believe is his current lover, not like I feel jealous because I no longer have anything towards him. A lot of things happened in the past between us, bitter-sweet memories. Long story short, I hurt him, real bad -I'm a closeted bi back then while he was very carefree about his sexuality so I can't stand him and it ultimately led our relationship to an end- and we lost contact ever since (he also blocked my number and all my social media accounts). Here I thought I can finally get things right, show him how sorry I am for what I've done, but he didn't even want to look at me. I called for him several times, I even came to him when her girlfriend's busy with other girls in the reception, he brushed me off with a smile. I don't know how much he's hurting because of me, looking at how he acted around me made me loathe myself even more. Well, he might never forgive me and I'm ready to take this as my punishment, still, I wish him happiness, I want him to be happy no matter who he's with, and hoping he'll never fall to someone like my past self ever again.
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