10-14-2010, 02:34 AM
Hello guys. So, here is my biggest problem. i can't understand my sexuality. I need some help, if there is some signs or manual to recognize your self better ?
well, it all began when I started to notice myself and others as sexual characters, meaning my puberty age. There is one big issue with what I can't deal with it (yet). I don't like my body. I'm short, too I mean too hairy, weight is also over the necessary. well, to say shortly I have complexes about my body and after a time I started to notice that I really get excited when I see beautiful guy but not just beautiful but guy with body of my dreams (body of my dreams is a bit loud but still with body I'd like to have) I tried some gay porn and the result is the same I may watch porn with fireman and have no reaction (even might fill uncomfortable) but if there is a character with body I like I may even cum couple of times. to not act as freak str8, I should also mention that I cant sear that I like all the girls, I mean that I have friends that don't care about partner, bubs ? ass ? hole ? no STD ? we are having sex !!!
thats not my type of act, even being extra drunk I'm not having sex with one chance partner. (was it some kind of lyric side over?). So, I hope I was clear enough to deliver my problem to you guys and hope to here some advises from you.
One thing that I want to understand am I a gay or this reaction is because of my body complex ?
P.S. there was some incident in my childhood but I was too young (it's not bad uncle and drunk father just gay like incident
). can that also to have some effect on my mental condition subconsciously ? I must to say that I am generally very clear minded person thing like my mom did not loved me and my I was abused in school does not bothers me. yes you may think that it is words said by all persons suffered in childhood but it is true I'm cold person. just fact that I cant deal with one thing like this am I gay or not drives me crazy. I just need to clear this for my self. I hate when I have some unclear stuff in my mind.
thank you for understanding and helping in advance.
mile:
well, it all began when I started to notice myself and others as sexual characters, meaning my puberty age. There is one big issue with what I can't deal with it (yet). I don't like my body. I'm short, too I mean too hairy, weight is also over the necessary. well, to say shortly I have complexes about my body and after a time I started to notice that I really get excited when I see beautiful guy but not just beautiful but guy with body of my dreams (body of my dreams is a bit loud but still with body I'd like to have) I tried some gay porn and the result is the same I may watch porn with fireman and have no reaction (even might fill uncomfortable) but if there is a character with body I like I may even cum couple of times. to not act as freak str8, I should also mention that I cant sear that I like all the girls, I mean that I have friends that don't care about partner, bubs ? ass ? hole ? no STD ? we are having sex !!!
thats not my type of act, even being extra drunk I'm not having sex with one chance partner. (was it some kind of lyric side over?). So, I hope I was clear enough to deliver my problem to you guys and hope to here some advises from you.
One thing that I want to understand am I a gay or this reaction is because of my body complex ?
P.S. there was some incident in my childhood but I was too young (it's not bad uncle and drunk father just gay like incident
). can that also to have some effect on my mental condition subconsciously ? I must to say that I am generally very clear minded person thing like my mom did not loved me and my I was abused in school does not bothers me. yes you may think that it is words said by all persons suffered in childhood but it is true I'm cold person. just fact that I cant deal with one thing like this am I gay or not drives me crazy. I just need to clear this for my self. I hate when I have some unclear stuff in my mind.thank you for understanding and helping in advance.
mile:
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
