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Asking the top or bottom ?
#15
Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:I can understand the frustration you have here.

Why waste 3-4 dates finding out about this person to discover you are both tops or bottoms and neither wants to give in to the other....? On another forum there are dozens of 'We are both Tops/Bottoms, what do we do?'. Most are several months down the road and the issue is a 'big one' for them and their enjoyment of sex.

I think anyone who is seriously looking for a relationship like yourself will consider sexual compatibility. Mind you are going to have to make an effort to have this 'conversation' after a date or two when you start figuring out if this guy is compatible and a potential relationship material sort.

You can go the blunt way - after all when you meet the guy you are obviously going to tell him 'Hey look, I'm not looking for just a hook up here. I want a relationship' If you are going that far already then you might as well list a few other things.

Be honest:

"In past relationships lying has been an issue, I cannot stand a partner who lies. Steals and cheats... Oh and he has got to be a bottom."

Add that last as a bit of comic relief. I think most guys will find the no lying, no stealing, no cheating to be reasonable - the comic humor of the last line will send a message if you include a nice smile with it, perhaps a chuckle and a wink.

Slip it in their.

I love your idea of slipping it in there as a joke to lighten the situation. The response can be a pleasant surprise and possibly bring up the subject matter.
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Messages In This Thread
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Gaydude3 - 12-16-2011, 05:07 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by AirBorn - 12-16-2011, 05:17 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Gaydude3 - 12-16-2011, 05:57 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by pellaz - 12-16-2011, 06:08 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by fenris - 12-16-2011, 06:26 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by pellaz - 12-16-2011, 07:25 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Gaydude3 - 12-16-2011, 08:16 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Kyle - 12-16-2011, 08:50 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Gaydude3 - 12-16-2011, 09:46 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by jamiebfd - 12-16-2011, 10:14 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Bowyn Aerrow - 12-16-2011, 10:25 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by LateBloomer - 12-16-2011, 11:30 PM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Bowyn Aerrow - 12-17-2011, 03:31 AM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by fenris - 12-17-2011, 10:40 AM
Asking the top or bottom ? - by Gaydude3 - 12-17-2011, 02:29 PM

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