12-26-2011, 04:54 PM
Just before I start I mean hurt in the emotional sense not in the physical sense.
About one week ago I found out my bf had been chatting guys up online and doing things on webcam with them if you catch my drift...
This had happened before (chatting in a sexual way, not webcam as far as I was aware at the time...) and I was really upset and I brought it up with him, he claimed he didn't know why he did it and that he 'felt bad' and wouldn't do it again cos he 'loved me so much'.
So then a month later I sign into his laptop to check my emails and his skype auto signed in, then I see a recent conversation list... I thought this was odd cos on my skype it said he hadn't signed in for months so I clicked onto the person and to only find out it was a 44 year old man and that my bf had requested him to masturbate with him on webcam, the conversation that went with it was disgusting and I had to stop reading.
However to fill in a bit of back story my boyfriend would never be 'horny' towards me when I wasn't with him in person, whenever I'd try to say I was in the mood and wanted him either by text or msn he would say 'I'm not like that! I don't do those things!'
Which was clearly all a lie cos after I found the Skype session with the 44 year old man I went back and had a look at MSN, other Skype messages and internet history and he had been actively seeking out men just to masturbate with them through a good duration of our relationship
I felt so hurt by this that I had to dump him as he had betrayed my trust, not only that but I'd found messages to others telling them things about me that I'd told him not to, so he had no respect for me at all.
However he tried to turn the situation at me and act like he was the innocent one by going onto Facebook and getting sympathy from his friends and family and trying to turn them against me, he claimed he told them exactly what he'd done, his mother and father are quite religious and innocent I can't imagine him saying to them 'by the way mum my bf found out that I was masturbating with men online'
It's horrible because I really got on with his friends and family but now they all hate me, I'm slowly but surely blocking all contact with him now as I can't stand to see his smugness and how he has just got away with hurting me, he has all but forgotten about me already anyway so I need to do the same.
The main reason for this post was to just ask has anyone had a similar situation and had a bf try to turn it against you and act like the hurt one when they was in the wrong?
I'd like to point out some people don't see online actions as cheating, but in a relationship I have I do see it as cheating, plus it's hurtful to me to think that someone would rather have someone else in that way when they have you, especially if they tell you they love you or even more so when they promise they won't hurt you or do these things again and then do!
About one week ago I found out my bf had been chatting guys up online and doing things on webcam with them if you catch my drift...
This had happened before (chatting in a sexual way, not webcam as far as I was aware at the time...) and I was really upset and I brought it up with him, he claimed he didn't know why he did it and that he 'felt bad' and wouldn't do it again cos he 'loved me so much'.
So then a month later I sign into his laptop to check my emails and his skype auto signed in, then I see a recent conversation list... I thought this was odd cos on my skype it said he hadn't signed in for months so I clicked onto the person and to only find out it was a 44 year old man and that my bf had requested him to masturbate with him on webcam, the conversation that went with it was disgusting and I had to stop reading.
However to fill in a bit of back story my boyfriend would never be 'horny' towards me when I wasn't with him in person, whenever I'd try to say I was in the mood and wanted him either by text or msn he would say 'I'm not like that! I don't do those things!'
Which was clearly all a lie cos after I found the Skype session with the 44 year old man I went back and had a look at MSN, other Skype messages and internet history and he had been actively seeking out men just to masturbate with them through a good duration of our relationship
I felt so hurt by this that I had to dump him as he had betrayed my trust, not only that but I'd found messages to others telling them things about me that I'd told him not to, so he had no respect for me at all.
However he tried to turn the situation at me and act like he was the innocent one by going onto Facebook and getting sympathy from his friends and family and trying to turn them against me, he claimed he told them exactly what he'd done, his mother and father are quite religious and innocent I can't imagine him saying to them 'by the way mum my bf found out that I was masturbating with men online'
It's horrible because I really got on with his friends and family but now they all hate me, I'm slowly but surely blocking all contact with him now as I can't stand to see his smugness and how he has just got away with hurting me, he has all but forgotten about me already anyway so I need to do the same.
The main reason for this post was to just ask has anyone had a similar situation and had a bf try to turn it against you and act like the hurt one when they was in the wrong?
I'd like to point out some people don't see online actions as cheating, but in a relationship I have I do see it as cheating, plus it's hurtful to me to think that someone would rather have someone else in that way when they have you, especially if they tell you they love you or even more so when they promise they won't hurt you or do these things again and then do!
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