01-02-2012, 09:43 PM
well...i'm so LONELY
i study for completing my highschool exam at the end of this year.i quit work for it.i love it that i don't have to go there,hated every second.
well,i am completely isolated now.i never really had a boyfriend and i feel like i never had a friend in the world.
i am actually past these feelings,but it would be so good to have a gay friend to talk about all the things and just hang out sometime...
i had a guy at work who i thought was a friend of mine,he said he was bi,but acted weirdly and to this day i wonder if he made fun of me and told everybody that ''that fag has a crush on me,he is lonely and pathetic,omg lol you guys''.or maybe i was too uncool or smt...i don't know.it was fishy
whatever...
i'm over it but i really would like him to be here right now and be there for me...
i think in the morning i will go buy a bottle of wine and drink it myself,as usually
it makes me feel good.i wish i lived in holland,i would smoke pot...
ehh...
i hate myself for not studying.i have these thoughts in my mind and they distract me.u know like it goes...
i procrastinate.and i can't afford to,cause i gotta get into uni otherwise life will be miserable.people are so homophobic and treat me like shit all the time,like i'm not human or smt,so i MUST get a profession in uni to work on my own,otherwise they will put me in an early grave.literally.
i know that .and i know that i MUST study.
i am 22 and doing my last year of highschool.i got bullied so bad i dropped out like 2 times.i was suicidal and everything seemed so hopeless.but that went away since i got rid of negatives in my life.now my outlook is clear.funny how that works,heh?
that guy at work pushed me away when i needed his friendship most and he would say things like ''omg ur 21 and still in school and i have a degree''.i guess i was too much of a loser to be his friend.you'd think a bi guy would be understanding about why i am ''still in highschool''.
fuck men.they suck so bad.
i just wish there was some cool guy in my life as a FRIEND who would share with me and all....i don't want relationships,i'm not ready.i just want a friend...such simple request it seems...
i guess that rhyme was right
''i tried to find a friend-it's more easily said,it's always been the same!''
:frown:
i study for completing my highschool exam at the end of this year.i quit work for it.i love it that i don't have to go there,hated every second.
well,i am completely isolated now.i never really had a boyfriend and i feel like i never had a friend in the world.
i am actually past these feelings,but it would be so good to have a gay friend to talk about all the things and just hang out sometime...
i had a guy at work who i thought was a friend of mine,he said he was bi,but acted weirdly and to this day i wonder if he made fun of me and told everybody that ''that fag has a crush on me,he is lonely and pathetic,omg lol you guys''.or maybe i was too uncool or smt...i don't know.it was fishy
whatever...
i'm over it but i really would like him to be here right now and be there for me...
i think in the morning i will go buy a bottle of wine and drink it myself,as usually
it makes me feel good.i wish i lived in holland,i would smoke pot...
ehh...
i hate myself for not studying.i have these thoughts in my mind and they distract me.u know like it goes...
i procrastinate.and i can't afford to,cause i gotta get into uni otherwise life will be miserable.people are so homophobic and treat me like shit all the time,like i'm not human or smt,so i MUST get a profession in uni to work on my own,otherwise they will put me in an early grave.literally.
i know that .and i know that i MUST study.
i am 22 and doing my last year of highschool.i got bullied so bad i dropped out like 2 times.i was suicidal and everything seemed so hopeless.but that went away since i got rid of negatives in my life.now my outlook is clear.funny how that works,heh?
that guy at work pushed me away when i needed his friendship most and he would say things like ''omg ur 21 and still in school and i have a degree''.i guess i was too much of a loser to be his friend.you'd think a bi guy would be understanding about why i am ''still in highschool''.
fuck men.they suck so bad.
i just wish there was some cool guy in my life as a FRIEND who would share with me and all....i don't want relationships,i'm not ready.i just want a friend...such simple request it seems...
i guess that rhyme was right
''i tried to find a friend-it's more easily said,it's always been the same!''
:frown:
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
