Desperately need ya'lls advice!

[Yosuke]

Hey everyone,

So I seriously, seriously need advice. Here's the situation. My best friend, Richard, and I have had a great friendship. We've had our ups and downs. When we first met like a year ago, I had feelings for him, and he rejected me, but then he initiated a friendship, and we became close. In the year since, we've had a lot of ups and downs as friends, but I always trusted him. Well, this past semester, I met a freshman named 'G' and was quite taken with him. He and I talked a lot, and I convinced him to join the Student Government, of which Richard and I were both in. So I tell Richard how I feel about 'G' and he tries to help me out, sort of like a wingman. Well, instead of that, Richard just becomes friends with this kid. Eventually Richard convinces me that G is straight, since that's what he told everyone else.

Every once in a while, Richard tries to set me up with a guy or two, but they are never interested, so I'm in a constant state of rejection. I get depressed about this, but eventually over the break I learn to love myself, yadda yadda, and I'm in a good place.

So flash forward to this Friday, my birthday. Richard tells me that he and Garrett have been dating for two months. My best friend, who I am sort of in love with but fine with being just friends with, is dating the guy I still have a crush on, and he knew I have a crush on this 'G' kid. First: ruined my birthday. Second, I'm not sure what's wrong with me. At first I was furious, then numb, then I was devastated and cried for three hours. And since yesterday, I've had no emotion. I'm not happy, or bitter, or angry, or sad, excited, etc. I CANT feel anything. I have no energy to eat. I'm hungry but I just don't feel like eating. I look into the mirror and I just see an empty shell looking back at me. I don't feel this way just because of the betrayal, sadness, rejection, and hurt of this situation, but as culmunation of everything I've experienced.

So, a few questions:
1. Should I keep being friends with Richard? I know the decision is up to me, but input is greatly appreciated.
2. What am I going through? I don't think its depression because I don't feel depressed. I don't feel anything. I don't even have the energy to make food, much less be angry.
3. How can I feel again? Whenever I try to muster up emotion all I get is anger and hate for Richard and his new boyfriend.