What kind of drunk are you?

[zeon]

Hello,
What kind of drunk are you? I am asking this because it has a story of event attached....

Last night whilst laying in bed playing Jewel maze on my HTC I heard a scream outside and a woman shouting for help... So i got out of bed put on my waterproof trousers and jacket over my briefs and went out in minus 6 celcius.. I walked over to her and said " You alright love?" She was rocking backwardws and forwards in the road and i asked again.. She said help me...

I asked if she had been drinking and she said yes... I held her hands and said right firstly lets get u out of the road or your going to get squashed She told me she couldnt and i asked why and she said because im sitting down here. I then said look its freezing cold and im not standing here for charity love... Now on count of three get off the floor and lets get you on the pavement.. She started to cry and i said sternly look lady get off the floor stop the crocodile tears because thats what five year olds do.. She agreed and got up and i asked where she lived and she pointed to a block of flats and i said what number?? She said 12 and after 15 minutes of dragging her round i rang the buzzer and it was no response... She went to bang on the door of the block and it was off the latch so she stumbled up the stairs and sat on the landing... Upon waking the other residents up i explained to them shes trying to get hold of a Victoria and asked them if they were.. They told me she doesnt live in this block and i asked her her name... She said charlotte so i said ok charlotte lets get you off the floor and out of here and she shouted IM NOT CHARLOTTE YOU DICK IM FUCKING JOANNA. I said ok Joanna... Firstly DO NOT EVER speak to a stranger in a tone when they are trying to help you as thats fucking dis respectful and secondly get a grip... If you dont then your be left here to freeze and is that what you want??? She shaked her head to indicate No and i said ok apologise and we can continue where we left off... She drunkernly apologised and i said right shall we go then?? She sat on the floor saying Phone victoria now please... Please help me and rocked back and fourth. I said is your phone in your bag? She replied Yes...
I searched through and found no phone so decided to ask a resident to call the non emergency number for the police... This was done and eventually the police turned up and escorted her off after she swore at them and they put her in cuffs for the cell for the night. I did notify the officer that she comes from Croydon which is 50 miles away according to her passport but she is insisting she lives round here...

This took an hour and i was freezing

So what kind of drunk are you?

Kindest regards

zeon x