Massive age differences

[FuppersAa]

Hey everyone,
For the past few weeks I've been thinking about the huge age differences that some gay couples have and am wondering how they make it work?
I myself have fallen for a 41 year old while I'm literally half his age, this doesn't seem to matter to the both of us but seems to matter to a fair few people in both our social groups.

To his date I've been called a sicko for having a relationship with someone who is old enough to be my father, being told that he is just using me for sex and another one is that I'm just a trophy to him, amoung various other things Id just rather not mention.

Now this social stigma that has been attached to us has really bothered me to the extent where I've questioned if this is really something I want to purse but have came to he conclusion I don't care what people think anymore as long as I'm happy and he is happy that's all that matters and people will eventually come around and accept it.

Now obviously there's a whole lot of differences weve had to work though just due to our age gap and am just looking to advice on how to make his work?

We met him on the 747.gау

[InbetweenDreams]

Here's what I say about age gaps. At the end of the day, if you and your partner are both consenting adults, who cares? Right? I mean stigma is just that, wasn't so long in the past where holding hands with my partner would have gotten angry looks.

As far as how to make things work, yes he's 41 and there are going to be some differences but that can make it all the more interesting. I think the age gap is lesser of an issue than it whether you two are compatible with each other on a personality basis. Do you get along, do you like each other, do things just click with this person? If you answer yes then I'd say see where things go.

[Scruff Bunch]

It is hard to be yourself and do your thing in a world of people telling you to be or do something else.

[lthrbottomscandi]

Hey! I was just thinking the same today as I have been dating someone more than double my age. I think there will be many people who will see it weird but who cares as long as you are happy! That's my conclusion today hahaha. Never really liked men my age

[andy]

Age is but a number... 10-20 years difference can be ok in many circumstances... as long as it doesn't look like grandparent and grandchild going for a walk!

[LoveAsian]

Hey everyone,
For the past few weeks I've been thinking about the huge age differences that some gay couples have and am wondering how they make it work?
I myself have fallen for a 41 year old while I'm literally half his age, this doesn't seem to matter to the both of us but seems to matter to a fair few people in both our social groups.

To his date I've been called a sicko for having a relationship with someone who is old enough to be my father, being told that he is just using me for sex and another one is that I'm just a trophy to him, amoung various other things Id just rather not mention.

Now this social stigma that has been attached to us has really bothered me to the extent where I've questioned if this is really something I want to purse but have came to he conclusion I don't care what people think anymore as long as I'm happy and he is happy that's all that matters and people will eventually come around and accept it.

Now obviously there's a whole lot of differences weve had to work though just due to our age gap and am just looking to advice on how to make his work?

We met him on the 747.gау

You make it work by blinding out the toxic opinions of others that don't act in your interest, but self interest in sleepwalking the bigotry they grew up around. 

The history of the West is ripe with people of bullying mindset. Do you remember a time when interracial dating was looked at with the same disgust and arrogant mocking? Look around conservative regions. Many bigots flock to those areas and in one way or another prey upon the happiness and well being of well-intentioned and pro-social gay people. They do this because they perceive community immunity and support for their behavior toward you, and political cover from higher up. 

That being said, why should the exact same toxicity be surprising to you? You need to understand that you experience problems, but YOU are NOT the problem and your relationship is NOT the problem. 

Look at your loving partner in the same way as others were in the same place as yourself. Understand the differences, embrace the richness of the experience and see things from your feelings and not of those who want you to submit to their mindset. 

If they are essentially asking you to live a fake life in exchange for their respecting you more ( living in accordance with their own narrow and toxic views), the price is too high. If they really respect ALL of you, then it will be consistent with supporting your happiness choices in being who you really are. They don't get to love you in slices, but the whole person.

Take the obvious and reverse it. Would they want to be mocked by you for their choices that are different from your own? Would they want YOU to respect them in whole or only in part?