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A man goes to heaven...
#1
...with two friends. When they get there they see ducks everywhere.
St. Peter informs them that they can do whatever they want but don't step on the ducks.
A week goes by and one man steps on a duck. St. Peter comes out with this ugly woman and says " this is who you will spend eternity with".
A month later the second man steps on a duck. St. Peter shows up with a hideous woman and says "this is who you will spend eternity with".
After a year the third man hadn't stepped on a duck and St. peter shows up with a gorgeous woman.
The man can't believe it and says " what could I have done to deserve such a beautiful woman".
The woman says "I don't know all I did was step on a duck"
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#2
I always picture this when I think of heaven:

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