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Crushing again...
#1
Hi guys,

Im just pretty confused right now. I just met this guy who you would think was totally straight. Hes cute and has a great body, we also get along very well. I thought he was straight at first and began ridding myself of my crush on him but then i started to notice that he always seemed to be positioned close to me though i dont see his eyes on me. That was my only clue at first but then at one point we had to work together so we talked quite a lot and got along very well. So yeah, at this point, he may just be another friendly straight guy but then something happened that really confuses me.

When we were working together, i needed to go to the bathroom. He said he had to go too so we went together. while i was peeing, i noticed from the side of my eye that he seemed to be jerking off and did in a position that made it possible for me to see. I, being the coward that i am, pretended that i did not see it. He still was very friendly though and asked for my number before we left.

I really want to know if he's straight or not. The problem is that im closeted and if hes gay, hes closeted too. I really dont want to have a crush on a straight guy so i wanna find out soon. Do i just go to him and, at the right moment, ask him about what i saw him doing? Or what? He seemed really really friendly when we were together but didnt seem to show much or any interest when we were apart. Im half thinking that im seeing his actions, that would normally be seen as straight, as gay simply because im hoping he is.

This is messing with my head so much right now. Advice please, oh wise ones?
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#2
Okay a few things

Thing A) He ask your number but did you give it to him

Thing B) Well I'm no expert I don't think it's commonplace for a straight guy ask another straight guy for his number well in the bathroom, take form that what you will.

Thing C) An this may be a bit of a red flag situation but the whole my possibly masturbating in the bathroom thing, well impressive the guy can get it up and going in that amount of time it’s also a….maybe a…hint creepy.
It could also be me begin a bit prudish but following a someone into a bathroom, than masturbating well they pee, than asking that person for their phone number seems like a strange thing do.
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#3
I'd say ask him if he wants to catch a movie or get coffee or something. It doesn't sound like you have enough information yet. If he's gay and wants you, he seems to move pretty fast. If you can get some alone time with him, a movie or casual man-date sort of thing, nothing serious, maybe he will open up a little bit or do something that makes his stance more clear. And if it turns out to be all in your head, then you've made friends with a really nice straight guy, and there's nothing wrong with that.

Gosh, some guys have all the luck!
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#4
Hey,
Well all this bathroom/masturbating thing is really weird...
But i think you can test the water by asking something about girlfriend (if you are that close) but 1st you should go for a beer or something i dont think at the work is the right place for this kind of question!
Wish you all the best, keep us updated Wink
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#5
TimmyThink Wrote:Okay a few things

Thing A) He ask your number but did you give it to him

Thing B) Well I'm no expert I don't think it's commonplace for a straight guy ask another straight guy for his number well in the bathroom, take form that what you will.

Thing C) An this may be a bit of a red flag situation but the whole my possibly masturbating in the bathroom thing, well impressive the guy can get it up and going in that amount of time it’s also a….maybe a…hint creepy.
It could also be me begin a bit prudish but following a someone into a bathroom, than masturbating well they pee, than asking that person for their phone number seems like a strange thing do.

1. We exchanged numbers. But not right after i saw him touch himself. He asked me before i left to go home.

2. It didnt look erect but it just looked like he was trying to get it up and was doing it in an angle that allowed me to kinda see it.

I texted him last night. The usual 'hey we should hang out' and he did reply saying that although we have a lot to do this week, we should find time. He didnt keep the conversation up for long though maybe either because we had an exhausting day (REALLY EXHAUSTING) or hes straight (i hope not haha)

As of right now, im just trying to push him out of my head so that i can concentrate on more important things but i really really hope hes gay Sad
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#6
argh saw a pic of him on fb oajslaksjndkjansd - crushing like a little girl haha
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#7
I think there is a big chance that he is gay/bi, but he may also be iind of confused. I think that even if he ain't, you two could be great friends and get along awesome, so don't be disheartened. A few things you could do right now are
- you remain totally friendly and drop slight hints that you like him (and carefully observe his reaction)
- you try to casually stalk his facebook page for any hints
- you hint on your interest in guys via little comments like 'i love the beach, lots of eye candy in tight speedos' or 'did you hear about that gay marriage law passing?' and something of the kind, which will allow you to see his reaction and whether he will want to pursue a further conversation about it..oh, you know what I mean.

It's all about hinting you see..

Also, just so you know, I'm here if you need someone to talk to about this, even if it's just to say how totally cute he is and how nice his voice is, PM me :redface:
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#8
SlipknotRlZZ Wrote:I think there is a big chance that he is gay/bi, but he may also be iind of confused. I think that even if he ain't, you two could be great friends and get along awesome, so don't be disheartened. A few things you could do right now are
- you remain totally friendly and drop slight hints that you like him (and carefully observe his reaction)
- you try to casually stalk his facebook page for any hints
- you hint on your interest in guys via little comments like 'i love the beach, lots of eye candy in tight speedos' or 'did you hear about that gay marriage law passing?' and something of the kind, which will allow you to see his reaction and whether he will want to pursue a further conversation about it..oh, you know what I mean.

It's all about hinting you see..

Also, just so you know, I'm here if you need someone to talk to about this, even if it's just to say how totally cute he is and how nice his voice is, PM me :redface:

I hope youre right. I will try those stuff but im just afraid i wont have many chances to. I do wanna text him but im afraid ill look too clingy and he is still to accept my friend request in fb. Right now im just trying to keep him off my mind and concentrate on other things but many of those things are related to him so the thoughts just keep on coming back. Argh... this is why i hate having crushes. So much uncertainty.

And thanks, id really appreciate that Smile
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#9
Oh, don't worry. Yes, try to get your mind off him right now, or at least off his body. If it's not working just brace yourself and wait for a few days, go out or something...and don't worry. The best things happen when they are least expected, and this goes for your time with him too. Just be patient. Uncertainty is good, grants surprises lol
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#10
Looking at it from another side, its so much harder for me cause im closeted. Finding out more about him and revealing more about myself carries the risk of me (and him, if he is gay) being exposed to everyone so i hope the risk is worth it *siiiiiiighs*

Why cant guys just walk around with a 'gay' or 'straight' sign on them. That way, we know who to go for and straight guys will complain less about being hit on by gay guys. argh.
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