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Do You Believe That Happiness Is A Choice?
#1
On a recent trip to DC, I bought a pastel drawing of the cherry blossoms in bloom that was inscribed with a quote by Abraham Lincoln:

"Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be."

I hung it in my office at work, and the response has been interesting...ranging from enthusiastic agreement to total scorn. The thing that kind of surprised me is that the younger the person, the more cynical their response, while older people seemed to be more accepting of the premise.

IDK...what do you think?
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#2
I totally agree with Abe.
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#3
Pyromancer Wrote:...The thing that kind of surprised me is that the younger the person, the more cynical their response, while older people seemed to be more accepting of the premise….
I don't find that surprising for two reasons. 1) I think most young people are still looking outside themselves for happiness: Career, the things that money can buy, relationship, status perhaps -- these are things they *believe* will make them "happy". 2) Not all but many older people have sort of "been there done that," and realize that "happiness" is a state of mind that, *to a certain extent,* is independent of either material possessions or even my circumstances. I have to say "to a certain extent" because, although we haven't defined happiness, there are certainly all sorts of "things" and "events" that can make me very UNhappy.
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#4
Abe said most people - most is not all.

I think Abe understood that happiness can be stolen away from a person as much as their freedoms, rights and other stuff.

I for one cannot 'choose' to be unhappy a lot of the time because way back in the ancient days of my childhood I had that stolen from me.

But most (not all) people didn't have their ability to choose their happiness or unhappiness and can make up their minds to be what they want to be.

There are other things that people have no control over that can take away their happiness. Depression is one of the all time killers of happiness - this is usually not an issue of one making a choice, but do to biological/chemical issues or situational issues that re-wires the brain causing a person to be down and sad all the time.

Assuming that a person is reasonably healthy (mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually) they can choose how they feel at any given moment and can form their own type of 'happiness' with any given situation.

But then being happy all the time is as bad if not worse than being sad all the time. This is known as mania....

I believe that contentment is the key to everything - finding that right balance of stuff in ones life, being satisfied with what one has can lead to a stable serenity and balance in life which opens the door to those moments of true happiness and everything else.
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#5
I believe if you have some sort of direction you could talk yourself into being happy. Most of us just wander around like zombies thinking of what could have been rather than what is.
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#6
Haven't you ever known anyone that you swore worked hard at being unhappy. The always looked on the dark side of everything or they seemed to enjoy wallowing in self pity.

I think President Lincoln was right.
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#7
I agree with Abe....

I just recently realized that a few people I know want to slap me because I am a little too optimistic and pretty much always look for the silver lining...and it annoys people. I have my negative stuff too... but I don't stay in that place for too long...

I "get it"...and I understand why they want to slap me....

I am EXTREMELY annoyed by them as well... people who always negative...and I would love to slap them sometimes too...so we are even

I do believe it is a choice how you want to approach life...even with depression and anxiety and all the other things they manufactured so we could take their drugs..
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#8
I don't think it's an either/or thing. I do think one can drag themselves into a funk if they get a bit too insular, or by focusing on negativity. But having gone through two depressive episodes, no, it's not like you can just smile your way out of it.

It literally is a completely different ball game then. It's like waking up wearing a two-hundred pound body suit on. Dragging your ass out of bed and out the door becomes a monumental chore. And trust me - platitudes like "attitude determines altitude" start to sting after a while. In essence, you're getting blamed for your depression. Nobody asks a person in a wheelchair if they've ever tried walking it off. Smile

Lex
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#9
yep, you can be happy or reaching the moon to the end and be always unhappy...
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#10
I fully agree with Abe and the understanding of the younger the person the more scornful they are. The younger crowd tend to think they know happiness. While others get stuck with being content it is only with wisdom or life experience that you realize most of the time true happiness has to be hunted. It's most likely not going to come knocking on your door. Life is what you make of it. I think the pick MikeW has says it all.Shakin
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