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Do you think it's okay to have no life purpose or goals?
#1
Hi Guys,

Do you think it's okay to have no life purpose or goals?

I just want to earn some money to pay for my needs and bills. I'm not really interested in building a career.

I have interest in learning musical instruments like guitar. I just want to spend my free time learning how to play my favourite songs on the guitar. I guess this is one of the life goals that I have.

Do you think it's okay to have no career goals or big goals like building start-up, business etc. in life?

Thank you.
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#2
Different people will tell you different things but I believe everyone can find their goal/ambition at their own pace. I think one of the biggest causes of mental stress in modern life is this whole perfectly templated life we are supposed to aspire to that other people impose on us. In my region this generally falls into the path of go to university / get degree / get impressive job on high salary / have a family / buy house etc etc. These goals are then set in to certain ages we are ‘meant’ to have done these things by. However I think deciding your career path at a young age isn’t right for some and instead you might need some life experience to truly find what interests and motivates you. Avoid listening to people who impose their own ideals on you; I have a friend who is constantly being asked by her colleagues “when are you having a baby?” “when are you getting married?”. We have one life to live and it is OURS. The university route will work for some, not for others, and everyone will encounter bumps in the road of life that can throw it all off course anyway.

I was going to go to university but had no idea what I wanted to do. When I was younger I’d wanted to be a teacher but this had got lost by this point. I even had a friend say how they hated ‘drifters’ like me with no goals in life. I just wanted to work (I still probably care too much about work), after a few years I did some night courses whilst working my way up the career ladder following my interests. I began on catering (I love cooking) before moving into marketing (then cooking became my at-home interest). All the time I was aware I enjoyed training courses and in the last two years I pursued this and this year became training lead at my company. This all has happened in my thirties but I’m so happy I followed this route as I have no student debt, I met so many amazing people during my career journey and have overcome some personal challenges too. I also have to point out the ‘friend’ who said all those years ago they hated ‘drifters’ like me has actually become a bit of a drifter themselves and their life went a bit downhill - there is no perfect template to life!

Focus on your interest (like guitar) as something you enjoy for your free time and then look at how you can support your free-time, bills etc with a career that can fund this and allow you to live comfortably until you determine a career that can fund you further for any more interests you develop and increased bills over time, as well as being something that really interests you.
Gossip is the Devil’s telephone; best just to hang up.
[-] The following 1 member Likes IanSaysHi's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#3
I think it's absolutely fine @soulfulriver. It's your life, you should do things at your pace. It is easy to compare yourself to others, but believe me, that never does you any good. I've never been really career driven. I have a job that pays the bills and allows me to live with modest comfort. I'm content, and am happy. And at the end of the day, it is your happiness that matters the most.
[-] The following 1 member Likes Cridders88's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#4
(09-25-2021, 10:21 AM)soulfulriver Wrote: Hi Guys,

Do you think it's okay to have no life purpose or goals?

I just want to earn some money to pay for my needs and bills. I'm not really interested in building a career.

There's more to life than work. The emphasis on careers is what is because money does play a big role in quality of life and contrary to popular belief, money does lead to happiness...to an extent. Likewise, if I made $100,000 per year, that might sound nice but if I hate every minute of working, then what is really different than if I were making $7.25 an hour flipping burgers in terms of happiness.

I think one of the misnomers about careers is that it needs to be something you're passionate about. I think that can be helpful but I also think there has got to be something you get out of it than just money. Maybe it is the feeling some people get from helping others. Some people it might be solving a complex problem that others struggle with. Little things like that. Some folks are perfectly fine with sweeping floors, coming in, doing their thing and go home.

So life, doesn't need to be solely focused around work, a career, or money. They are important, yes, but they don't by themselves bring you happiness or meaning.

(09-25-2021, 10:21 AM)soulfulriver Wrote: I have interest in learning musical instruments like guitar. I just want to spend my free time learning how to play my favourite songs on the guitar. I guess this is one of the life goals that I have.

Do you think it's okay to have no career goals or big goals like building start-up, business etc. in life?

Thank you.

Perhaps you have answered your own question as to what it is you want to do. Now, can playing the guitar become a career, well maybe...maybe not. Doing things, whether it is learning to play the guitar, or maybe another hobby like fishkeeping or gardening are things that bring meaning to one's existence. What you do with your hobbies, interests, gifts is up to you. A lot of famous people's stories start with humble beginnings. No matter what it is you decide to do in terms of hobbies, work, a career all take effort, hard work and time, with few exceptions. So perhaps you become proficient with the guitar, perhaps people will pay you to watch you play it one day.
[-] The following 1 member Likes InbetweenDreams's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#5
As long as you can take care of yourself and anyone you might be responsible for who cares how you do it. Whether you win the lottery and spend the rest of your life watching TV or build the next Google if you're happy who cares. If you can do something to improve the lot of others along the way it would be nice and likely will make you feel better about yourself as well.
[-] The following 1 member Likes calgor's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#6
Maybe you don't need to have a purpose at the moment. That's fine.

Live your life, be good to yourself and the ones you care for, and perhaps at a later date, a specific purpose will open up to you.

and if not, that's fine too.
Tell him when l come up to him and ask to play the record, l'm gonna say: 
''Voulez-vous jouer ce disque?''
'Voulez-vous, will you kiss my dick?'
Will you play my record? One-track mind!
[-] The following 1 member Likes CellarDweller's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#7
All of my goals in life have failed so I find not making any anymore helps avoid more disappoint down the road.
[-] The following 1 member Likes Chase's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#8
(09-26-2021, 06:15 PM)Chase Wrote: All of my goals in life have failed so I find not making any anymore helps avoid more disappoint down the road.
You could say avoiding disappointment is your goal Wink
Gossip is the Devil’s telephone; best just to hang up.
[-] The following 1 member Likes IanSaysHi's post:
  • soulfulriver
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#9
Thank you for your replies @IanSaysHi, @Cridders88, @InbetweenDreams, @calgor, @CellarDweller and @Chase Smile

(09-25-2021, 10:55 AM)IanSaysHi Wrote: Different people will tell you different things but I believe everyone can find their goal/ambition at their own pace. I think one of the biggest causes of mental stress in modern life is this whole perfectly templated life we are supposed to aspire to that other people impose on us. In my region this generally falls into the path of go to university / get degree / get impressive job on high salary / have a family / buy house etc etc. These goals are then set in to certain ages we are ‘meant’ to have done these things by. 

(09-25-2021, 01:54 PM)Cridders88 Wrote: It is easy to compare yourself to others, but believe me, that never does you any good.

Quite true. When I was in my final semester in university, most of my classmates started finding and securing jobs 2 - 3 months before graduation! On the other hand, I was struggling to complete my FYP (final year project) and final few modules at that time and barely had time to even write my resume or practice for my interview.

I never understood the rush for finding job when one has not even graduated with the degree yet. I actually wanted to take a break for one month after graduation and then start finding a job.

My thoughts were like "once you start working, you will continue to be working until retirement age. So why not take a good rest first before entering the working life?"

But I have to admit that I felt slightly pressured and worried when others started finding job early. It was like "Am I taking the wrong decision for choosing to finding job slightly later? Will I regret about this in the future?" It was tough to remain calm and serene while you hear other classmates discussing about their job interview results.

But I chose to stick to my decision and it was not bad after all. I still managed to find a job 2 - 3 months after graduation. Smile
[-] The following 1 member Likes soulfulriver's post:
  • calgor
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#10
(09-30-2021, 12:49 PM)soulfulriver Wrote: I never understood the rush for finding job when one has not even graduated with the degree yet. I actually wanted to take a break for one month after graduation and then start finding a job.

My thoughts were like "once you start working, you will continue to be working until retirement age. So why not take a good rest first before entering the working life?"


It's a matter of necessity. To many people, they have to find a job as soon as possible. For example, here in the US, many people take on a huge amount of student loans to go to a university, and they a limited "grace period" to find a job and start paying them off.

The world can be a scary place, and the less money, class, and power you have, the scarier it is. So to many parents, even if they can afford to have their kids take a month long rest, they'd rather see their kids land a job and become self-efficient as soon as possible.  How supporting (and friendly) one is with there parents is also a major factor. As long as your parents are financially supporting you, you are essentially at their mercy. So, for me for example, while my mom is supportive of me being gay, I still find her . . . how should I put this . . . ANNOYING . . . so I'd rather get a job and move out ASAP.
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