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Don't mind me... Just gibberish...
#1
I seek no pity, I don't want any grief, Don't give me no credit... All is just nonsense. I just need is to let of some steam. I just... Hate always pretending that everything is nice and sunshine, but even more to be a bloody spoiled brat that is always nagging... I'm just pathetic, a sad excuse of life... Without any dreams, without any goals, without any opinion, just an empty shell. Even to lousy to ever get a job and to dumb to get a nice education. Just wasting time on nothing, cause there is nothing left for me, nothing was there meant for me. Just look upon everyone else, overcoming so big obstacles, going through hell yet stand tall and proud, while I'm just sealing my self from everything and everyone cause I'm to afraid of the reality. I'm nothing, and that is what my destiny is. "Life is not given, its earned", and I'm not worthy...
Sometimes you need a bit of chaos in your life to be able to shrug off pitiful disdain about something meaningless.
#2
You're not alone, Zet, believe me. Bighug
Still wondering what I'll be when I grow up.
#3
Zet, it's all about attitude. As long as you think you aren't worthy, you aren't. If you think you don't deserve it, whatever or whoever it is, then you won't have it.

See, as humans we are amazingly prophetic, yes every one of us. WE are nearly perfect at creating and, bringing to fruition a whole slew of self-fulfilling prophesies by way of what we think we are worthy of or deserve or, what we thinks will happen to us.

If we think we don't deserve something and find it, we will subconsciously sabotage ourselves to loose it. We are out own worst enemy, it takes little attitude adjustment to defeat that and, you can't just pay it lip services, you have to honestly believe you are worthy of love and that you do deserve good things in life. Once you do, it happens faster than you can imagine right now. All of those hang ups and road blocks to getting it become challenges that you know you can overcome, and you know you're going to win, so you keep going and, before long, you realize you have won a lot of the battles of life and, will win the rest too.
#4
You are anything but nothing my friend.

I've seen your posts here, and though I do not know you personally, nor have we even spoken much on the forums, I can tell by your "voice" and your words in your postings that you are a very introspective, intelligent and caring young adult.....a rare quality in one your age.

I know it can be difficult to suffer through the trials and tribulations life throws at you. The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. But the fears and doubts we all suffer about ourselves can gnaw at us, eating away our self-esteem and sense of worth like a cancer...its a gradual process but unless you catch it in time, there's nothing left to give.

You are a unique person with his whole future ahead, shining bright and full of promise. Believe in yourself and know that your "destiny" whatever it may be is yours and yours alone to control. Just take the reins of it and steer it in the direction you choose.
#5
Zet, idk why you think you can't do this and that. Just stop comparing yourself with others and focus on what your goals are and take concrete steps to achieve it. Everything takes time, hard work and consistency, there's few exceptions.

You sound like you know what the problems are - that's already a good first step. You still have plenty of time to experiment with what you want out of life, so that's a good plus.

I personally like to have things planned out before I make the next step. You said you've talked to school councilor about planning your path, what did he say?
#6
I'm in the same condition as you Zet. or maybe I was. sometimes this feeling keeps coming off and on. I'm still trying to erase all these emptiness, frustration and sadness by thinking positively and be grateful for everything that I have. And sometimes, it does really helps.
maybe all you need is to be more positive, confident, never think about what you can't do, but what can you do. Everyone was born with their own skills and special ability. and maybe you just haven't found it yet.
#7
BighugBighugBighugBighug
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BighugBighugBighugBighug
#8
that you can stand up and be proud is something, despite
the challenges you mentioned. anyone can stand and be
proud when all is flowers and sunshine. the one who can
do so when it's dark and clowdy, bleak and cheerless, is
truly strong.

posting such thoughts helps so many who also feel desolate,
letting us know we're not alone. you help! and that is a
thing of great value.

hugs from another soul in a world that can be cold.

Imu2
#9
During most of the last year I have felt similar feelings. In that time I've been left unemployed, left my ex and moved back in with my parents, racked up some debt, lost a few "friends" and some other stuff. I never did very well in school and anything after that (IT qualifications) are practically useless to me because of how different working in those areas were to what I imagined, It's so easy to choose to hide away from everyone but it only ends up with you being on your own feeding yourself images of how you think you are.

It took me a long time to start standing up again and fighting back the negativity but trust me when I say it's the best thing that I've done. I applied for many jobs but I always made a half hearted application because of how I felt about myself, now I've picked myself up somewhat I have started thinking harder about the applications and finally I can see I'm getting more responses then I was before (even happy to see the bad responses as I never got those before), even landing an interview for Monday. A small bit of positivity is potentially getting me kick started into being back within the world (and workplace even though it's a temporary job for the christmas period) on a regular basis.

You don't have to be the most educated to be successful, success isn't about what job you can get or what money you earn but how well you feel about yourself and what you have achieved in the current climate. What other people are doing should be the least of your concerns also, what you see on the outside isn't always how it seems behind closed doors, these so called people getting over "big obstables" may have even bigger obstacles which they don't want others to know about. Chin up and look at what you can do rather then what you think you can't do then you'll realise that you needn't put yourself down so much. Confusedmile:
#10
I honestly thought my life was empty and going no where than I decided to take a different career step in my life that would make my life a whole lot better. try finding something you enjoy and go with that at first. go from there. You can do it!


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