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I wish I could but I can't
#1
I've been sexually attracted to men for a long time but was too afraid to act on those feelings. When I lived on my own, I used to fantasize for hours with my toys. Now, I'm married but I think about men so often.

There was a gorgeous, flamboyant spanish man at this pita place I went to for lunch today. I never saw him working there before but the moment I saw him, I began wishing. I got flustered and so did he as I tried to place my order. Once we both realized we were staring at each other with our eyes glazed over softly smiling, he got real nervous real fast.

He wished me a happy new year and I did the same.

On my way home, he was all I could think about. I really can't take it any more. I've held these feelings in for so long and they get stronger all the time. I want to be with men but I just can't.

I love the whole concept of being gay. It seems so perfect. Men with men seems so right to me. I often think to myself that all men must be gay. I can't understand how anybody could deny being attracted big strong men or little feminine men. I love them both. I tell myself, "every guy must be gay" because it makes me feel like I'm not facing these feelings alone.
#2
First off, welcome to GS! That's a cool story, bro. If you feel it's perfect to be gay, I say go ahead and come out. Go for it, man! We're here if you need advice on this.
#3
Hey..happy new year!

Well, of course the best thing to do would be to come out, I mean, that's... And I am sure that you will be very happy about it and stuff. Yeah, the whole concept of being gay is perfect. I just hope that you won't have problems with your wife or your parents or whatever. :]]

Like Cutieboy said, you can count on us. :]
PENNYWISE LIVES
#4
I can't come out because of my relationship. I mean she kinda knows I'm attracted to guys but she doesn't know the extent of it. When I see a guy I think is gay or just plain hot, I go into this spin where it dominates my thoughts and I go online looking at men and thinking about men.

I even have go into my wife's secret toy box to use her dildo if nobody is home. It is soooo refreshing when that happens. Dressing up in women's clothing and playing with toys is the best way to pass the time.

If I could do it all over again, I might even try being a shemale. They turn me on so much.
#5
You can always end that relationship, right? Do you love her?
PENNYWISE LIVES
#6
I love her very much. I am just torn because gay sex is so damn hot.
#7
Do you think that she would be accepting if you told her about the whole thing? Do you think she may agree on a relationship where you can experiment with men too?
PENNYWISE LIVES
#8
We've talked about it briefly but never really finished the conversation. She's mentioned threesome with another guy but I then I would be all over the other guy. She'd just end up watching because I wouldn't be able to control myself.

I just want to feel a man's body next to mine. Every part of his body. What is it like? My god it must be so good.
#9
I'm pretty sure it is amazing. :] Well, I mean, you can always try without her knowing, or you can talk to her about it again and do it with her knowing. She should be understanding.
PENNYWISE LIVES
#10
It's never that simple when another person is involved. The marriage vow is generally till death. Sadly, some people fall into marriage too soon.

You don't say whether or not you have any children. The situation becomes far more difficult when you do.

Can you see yourself still being with your wife in two years? Five years? Twenty years? You may love her, but is it the right kind of love and is it enough - for you and for her? If she is truly game for a threesome with another man why are you so worried? If you really are more cut out to be with a man rather than a woman it certainly sounds like one way for you, and for her, to find out. If you continue to deny the call of your real sexual orientation things will get worse rather than better and it is likely you will eventually end up having to deal with mental health issues too.

Two metaphors - sometimes it's best just to whip the plaster off quickly; when a ball of string becomes too tangled you sometimes have to cut it.

Good luck.


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