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Is it ok to do this or not?
#1
Last Friday me and my boyfriend (or ex-boyfriend) had a fight because since he works in a gay Nightclub as a photographer he was going to have like a party kind of things in the VIP section, and I told him that I wanted to go with him and he said to me that if I was going to go, it would be by myself and if I went I should forget about him and of course I told him that I would forget about him since he has no right to tell me what I should or should not do, the funny thing is that he told me he was going to work when I knew he was not because he said it himself on a video he posted on facebook. I never really wanted to go since I don't like to go to those places so often, maybe once every 1-2 months. The thing is his birthday is tomorrow and I don't know if I should tell him happy birthday since I don't want to be a jerk. There's no way I'll go back with him even if it kills me because I know what he did shows that he does not care about me at all, his excuse for me not to go to those clubs is that he doesn't like me being around "those kind of people" but he seems pretty comfortable around them lol, he was supposed to be celebrating his birthday but I don't think it's right for him not to include me. Anyways should I wish him a HB, or ignore him for what he did?
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#2
Hi DonJohn and welcome to gs Smile

Maybe just a simple Happy Birthday will do.
Any chance you could be just friends with him ? If so do not burn all your bridges , that you may regret later.
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#3
Since you're done with him (and for good reason), you don't need to wish him a happy birthday. At this point, it could be perceived as an attempt to get back together with him and maintain ties. He's got Facebook friends and co-workers. Let them tell him "happy birthday".
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#4
I agree with swalter. What your ex said was pretty sketchy; if I were in your situation I would not give him the satisfaction of knowing that he was on my mind. But like Wolfpack said, don't do something that would "burn a bridge" either.

Best of luck to you DonJohn!
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#5
Hi DonJohn!

My advice...if you feel like saying Happy Birthday then by all means do so. Taking the high road whenever possible is the best course of action in my opinion.

Don't let his actions define who you are in any way.
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#6
How is saying Happy Birthday to a very recent ex who lied and treated him like shit "taking the high road"? I'm sorry, but taking the high road is moving on and refusing to engage him.
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#7
swalter Wrote:How is saying Happy Birthday to a very recent ex who lied and treated him like shit "taking the high road"? I'm sorry, but taking the high road is moving on and refusing to engage him.

That is my opinion...if he doesn't like my advice he is free to ignore it. You can ignore it as well if you prefer to do so.
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#8
I personally would wish him a happy birthday IF he crosses my path on that day.

I would not go out of my way to wish him birthday greetings, but I do attempt to remain civil. Unless he made a scene, then it would be gloves off time.
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#9
East Wrote:That is my opinion...if he doesn't like my advice he is free to ignore it. You can ignore it as well if you prefer to do so.
I asked you how your advice is "taking the high road". In what way is your advice the superior moral position?
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#10
I would probably wish him happy birthday, it costs nothing of you but may be a pinprick to his heart.
Of course I wouldn't do it for any revenge type deal but for exactly what East said. Being able to be civil and decent to someone that has hurt you is a show of character and is indeed "the high road". Hope things work out for you man, what he did was a jerk thing to do.
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