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Looks vs. Personality
#1
90% of everyone I've ever met: Gooood I hate people who just care about looks. What's on the INSIDE should be the only thing that matters, true love conquers everything GYAAH.

Me: So you wouldn't mind being together with someone of your your own sex?

90% of everyone I've ever met: Well... I wouldn't want to do that...

Me: How about someone who used to be your sex but isn't anymore?

90% of everyone I've ever met: EWW.


So we all know that most people who claim to only care about the inside are being bullshitting hypocrites. I thought it might be interesting to see how people on here prioritize when it comes to potential love interests. I mean this is the internet so people should be able to answer sincerely, right?

I think I'm 80% personality and 20% looks. I seem to find nice personalities more attractive than most people I know although I wouldn't pretend to be 100% indifferent to appearance. I've noticed that I have this thing though where I find most people to be either cute or goodlooking in at least some way... oh well. I mean, I do have periods of drooling over people who fit all my shallow fetishes but I think I'd just be really happy if I had someone who liked the same things I do. Listening to music together, reading together in bed and traveling together blah blah clichés. And most of the things I find REALLY attractive happen to be a certain interest, talent or personality trait. Musicians are sexy.

So, in order to summarize.

Looks: how important?
Personality: how important?
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#2
It all depends on someones mood at that particular point in time and what they are looking for.

Some people who just have anonymous sex, will usually not care about personality, as they are only looking for someone good looking to be with.

People who are looking for something permanent, but dont know any better, or have been brainwashed with all the usual bullshit, will be looking for looks, because they have been led to believe that only good looking people have good personalities, fat people are all mean, and ugly people are hateful.

People who DO know better, may be attracted initially by looks, style, or demeanor, but will base their long term interest on personality.



For me, I like looking at pretty people, but Id rather have a plain looking guy with an awesome personality.

Depending on my mood and what day it is, I would say my choice is generally Personality 75% and Looks 25%....on average.
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#3
MisterTinkles Wrote:It all depends on someones mood at that particular point in time and what they are looking for.

Some people who just have anonymous sex, will usually not care about personality, as they are only looking for someone good looking to be with.

People who are looking for something permanent, but dont know any better, or have been brainwashed with all the usual bullshit, will be looking for looks, because they have been led to believe that only good looking people have good personalities, fat people are all mean, and ugly people are hateful.

People who DO know better, may be attracted initially by looks, style, or demeanor, but will base their long term interest on personality.



For me, I like looking at pretty people, but Id rather have a plain looking guy with an awesome personality.

Depending on my mood and what day it is, I would say my choice is generally Personality 75% and Looks 25%....on average.

Really? Actually, I have this thing where I'm more likely to believe a beautiful person is mean. I know that prejudice is just as bad as the opposite but pretty kids are more likely to grow up as the popular ones and... that usually causes quite a lot of arrogance.

I think it's just something I picked up in high-school and couldn't quite leave behind me. I know it's not true and that you can't think like that.
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#4
You're 100% right SolemnBoy!
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#5
I really do need a combination of both. I'm not sure what percentages I would assign, but there needs to be both a physical and mental attraction. I may lust over someone physically, but if I don't get any mental stimulation out of it, it's a waste of my time. The flip side is also true. I can have the best conversations with some folks, but if I'm not attracted physically at all, it doesn't work for me. Some may see this as shallow or self limiting behavior, but it is what it is.

The truth here is that I'm usually instantly attracted to someone on both levels or not at all. There's never been a 'meet in the middle' for me.
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#6
I would go further to say that more than 20% is based on looks, especially if we are talking first impressions of a person. Until you actually meet a person and get to know their personality then your impressions and attractions are 100% based on appearances and mannerisms.
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#7
a great personality will shine through; the boy will be handsome too
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#8
Lets see I have been with 8 men "that way". 6 were 'my type' physically speaking, the other 2 were outside of my preference range. 6 relationships, and 4 were my preferred body type, two were not....

So what is the percentages? 75% on one hand 66.666...% on the other. So that averages out to about 70.833%.

However. My 'must haves' when it comes to physical preferences are not that many. I prefer men taller than me and meatier than me and around my own age about 8 years on either side of my current age.

Apparently race isn't that important to me, as I have been with both forms of Indians (one from India, one native American) a black man, and 'whites'... Uncertain if 'white' applies to all 5, Is Eastern European actually white? Is Mediterranean actually white? Hmmm.....

When it comes to personalities there is a definite set of personality traits which appear to be nearly mandatory. When it comes to the relationships, 5 out of six were definitely dominant personalities. I don't mean they were 'tops' - I mean they took charge and were 'heads of the household' type of dominant. They also had 'strong opinions' with no fear in voicing those opinions...

If we go with that then about 83.3333...% of my motivation is personality over physicality.
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#9
I am often seeking to improve my appearance. If someone hates my personality, then that's their problem, not mine.
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#10
Sis, if that boy can love and appreciate me for me and treat me with respect and take care of himself, he could have me sideways,upside-down and six ways to sunday.

Regardless if he has a lazy eye or a missing tooth, speech impediment(s) or a missing finger, especially because those are things that really can't be helped and as such should not be a reason for you to judge them and not date them.

I saw this for all accounts, cute black boy(probably 16, so a boy to me lol) come to the side of the bus while it was docked and tapped on the glass to get the attention of an equally cute girl, to whom he BBM'ed(messaged) and then looked up to see the look on her face when she saw and smiled when she blushed, revealing the fact he was missing one of his smaller incisors on the top and when she turned around, she had blotches (like freckles, but she was black) on her face, which some people find gross, but looked so enamoured with each other and didn't care who saw, which I find so sweet.

So I'm just waiting lol, for someone who can accept me for my flaws and weaknesses, regardless of their looks (so long as they are upkept -trimming body hair,facial hair, etc). Personality is the Key to my Chastity belt, but the Lock is in my heart <3
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