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Moses and the ten commandments
#1
Kinda old but still kinda good stuff.

Read all the way to the bottom for the best laugh!


HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS

God went to the Arabs and said,

'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.'

The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments?'

And the Lord said, 'They are rules for living.'

'Can you give us an example?'

'Thou shall not kill.'

'Not kill? We're not interested..'


So He went to the Blacks and said, 'I have Commandments.'

The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,

'Honor thy Father and Mother.'

'Father? We don't know who our fathers are.

We're not interested.'


Then He went to the Mexicans and said,

'I have Commandments.'

The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said 'Thou shall not steal.'

'Not steal? We're not interested.'

Then He went to the French and said,

'I have Commandments.'

The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.'

'Sacre bleu!!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'

Finally, He went to the Jews and said,

'I have Commandments..'

'Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?'

'They're free.'

'We'll take 10.'


There. That should piss off just about everybody.....
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#2
Let's make it ecumenical.
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#3
Rofl

Wow, you're an Equal Opportunity Offender.
Bernd

Being gay is not for Sissies.
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#4
Well if we want to make it more equal opportunity...

So He went to the gays and says, "I have commandments."

The gays swished, fanning themselves, and asked, "Like what, honey?"

"Thou shalt not commit adultery."

"Talk to the hand! Oh wait, I'm using it..."


Blushing God hurried on to the Americans. "I have commandments."

The Americans suspiciously said, "This had better be good..."

"One is thou shalt not covet..."

"GET OUT OF HERE, COMMIE!"


Someone should add these in and start posting them to joke sites so they'll eventually become part of it. I was thinking of adding one for the English, like no idols offending British flag worship or their love of Dr. Who but I'm not sure how that would exactly work out. Wink
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#5
RoflRoflRoflRoflRoflRoflRoflRofl
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