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My bf is mad at me for I stopped by to their house unannounced?
#21
SrChulo Wrote:Wow, that sounds really tough. I could see how something similar might happen to me. :redface: But, as an outsider, I think if you are strong enough to take a break from him, I'd definitely do it. You sound like me, in the way that once every two weeks is just not enough, and you want to be treated with respect and affection. Unfortunately you've fallen for this guy so you're making excuses for his behavior. From what you've written, you do not seem to be at fault for most of this stuff.

If it really is only once every two weeks, then have you guys only hung out about 4 or 5 times? If you haven't become too attached, I would say it's best to take a break from him and see how he reacts. There ARE guys out there who will want to hang out with you more and initiate it too. And send you sweet messages. That comment he told you on thanksgiving was pretty brutal and rude.

You think I'm making excuses for his behavior? I do not know. Maybe. I keep thinking about me always sending him messages asking when I can see him, or text me when you get home before, were kind of bad, like smothering? or what he calls them DRAMA. But I've changed since I noticed that he barely speaks to me. I would only text him at night whenever I think he's home. I'd do that so he won't think I'm a nagger or something.

Well, before, we would hang once a week, then lately, just once in two weeks. That's how busy he is. I'm attached to him. So I was really wondering, if there's still a way to not end this case.
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#22
It sounds like you ought to go out and have some fun! This all sounds like hard work and a relationship shouldn't be this tough, especially one that's only two months old.

Time to get on with the rest of your life. If he comes calling he may be lucky if you are still available, but don't wait around for him. You have already established that sending him text messages isn't getting you anywhere.

His move.
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#23
I'm with marshlander, this relationship sounds like too much work.

From what you've shared, your boyfriend sounds a bit of a jerk, to be honest. Sometimes it's hard to see what someone is really like when you really want it to work out. I think it's perfectly reasonable to want to be with someone who actually wants to spend time with you. It just sounds like your boyfriend wants to keep you at arm's length. If I am with someone I really dig, I love to hear from them. What you have shared makes me think that this guy is "just not that into you." Of course, I could be wrong, maybe he just has problems with emotional intimacy; but then you'd have to wonder if you are willing to be with someone who will probably always frustrate you because he can't give you the affection and love that you want (and deserve, I think).

If I were you, as hard as it probably is, I wouldn't contact him again. You've done enough to show you care and want to spend time with him, now it's his turn to reciprocate. Honestly I hope you take a break and then find somebody else who actually is chuffed to see you.
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#24
TimeBandit Wrote:I'm with marshlander, this relationship sounds like too much work.

From what you've shared, your boyfriend sounds a bit of a jerk, to be honest. Sometimes it's hard to see what someone is really like when you really want it to work out. I think it's perfectly reasonable to want to be with someone who actually wants to spend time with you. It just sounds like your boyfriend wants to keep you at arm's length. If I am with someone I really dig, I love to hear from them. What you have shared makes me think that this guy is "just not that into you." Of course, I could be wrong, maybe he just has problems with emotional intimacy; but then you'd have to wonder if you are willing to be with someone who will probably always frustrate you because he can't give you the affection and love that you want (and deserve, I think).

If I were you, as hard as it probably is, I wouldn't contact him again. You've done enough to show you care and want to spend time with him, now it's his turn to reciprocate. Honestly I hope you take a break and then find somebody else who actually is chuffed to see you.

Thank you so much for your help and for others as well. You all are right. He is really a jerk. Like one time, I asked him when is his concert (he performs with his friends on stage sometimes). He told me when and he said me this: "The ticket is $20. Can you afford?"

I was like wow. I can afford yeah, but to ask that to someone your supposedly a partner, not a stranger, that was really rude. Like man, I am your boyfriend right?

He's 31 and I'm 23. Age is just a number. I admit that I did some childish things but of course I'm still learning. But sometimes I feel like he's more childish than me. Whatever.

I am moving on. I stopped contacting him again. But I need closure which I will get soon hehe
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