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The breakup
#1
Last weekend, I went to the capital to meet him. I knew deep down it was going to be the last weekend that i was going to spend with him. It was just a gut feeling I had. I went there anyway, we spent an amazing day until we were walking down the street in the city late at night. We sat down in a park. I wanted to go get us ice cream while he was having a sandwich. I told him I was getting ice cream then he said he was coming with me cuz he was almost finished. I told him that I'll be a minute gone and I'll be back soon. He just stared at me then said "Oh, so you want sometime alone? Ok, go have sometime alone." ... I just shook my head and left to get ice cream but then I turned to find him following me.
Anyway, it was already late and there were no ice cream shops open. So we went back to his place. On the way back, I asked him why he's upset cuz I can sense it. He said it's just weird that I wanted to leave him and go which just bothered me cuz why the hell does he assume shit like this on his own?

I said I was just getting us ice cream. So then out of nowhere he hugged me and started laughing. When he was done I asked him wtf he's doing and he was like "It's just me. That's the way I am. Take it or leave it. We can just laugh about it and let it go and you can keep explaining to me and it helps."
I didn't say anything, till he asked me what my answer was... I told him "I'm too tired and I can't think straight so I have to go to bed and I'll tell you in the morning."

we got back to his place and after trying to push me to speak I just couldn't cuz I am too tired then he eventually agreed that we go to bed.. well, We didn't really go to bed immediately. We did have sex before that. Hehe

Next morning, after I took a shower he sat me down wanting to hear me out. I told him I needed to have breakfast first but he was really pushy about it so I had to tell him.
I said: "You're over emotional and you make up shit in your mind out of nowhere. I've been in too many unhealthy relationships because I was too tolerant, too understanding, too many things giving to the other half on the cost of my happiness and my personal comfort. No relationship exists without happiness and this is what you're pushing for us to have. So you have a lot of shit to figure out and work out before we can start dating again and I can be there for you and help you as your friend till you do it."

after he heard that, he just started crying and repeating the word "Stay" over and over. He suggested that we just take it slow which I don't want. I told him no but if he needed some time alone I can give it to him. He asked to have breakfast first so we did and then I gave him sometime alone. So we did and I went to see another friend. Then he texted me asking where we should meet and when. We arranged for a time and place. when we got there, I ordered what I wanted then he told the waitress he doesn't want anything. I looked at him and said what?
He looked at me and said "I think I should just go" It's then I was extremely fed up and got really pissed off. I told him to knock it the fuck off and stop being so ridiculous and fucked up. OUT OF NOWHERE he started asking me why I want to spend time with him when I broke up with him in the morning. What I am doing with him, spending time with him and that I made him feel bad about himself for telling him that he has issues. He just put everything on me and started blaming me for everything...

Which literally blew my mind cuz he suggested that we meet before anything. Guy was messed up and all over the place being so emotional. Then I realized I was dating a fucking psycho and resisting him won't help the situation so I went easy and just went with him, we talked and I was listening till the end.. Then we left and I told him it's better I pack my bags and go to my friend's place for me and him. He agreed and we walked back to his place. I honestly felt scared that he would lash out on me or throw me out of some set of stairs so I kept a small pace behind him just a couple of steps to make sure he doesn't do anything. When we got there. I was packing my bags and he came up to me and said "I don't want to see this face for a while" I told him "Yes, ok" then he started crying hysterically saying that he likes everything on me and he likes me. I just told him to stop crying and started hugging him. then he started kissing me so I just went with it and kept kissing him till he walked me to his doorstep and I left with my stuff.

Man, I was so relieved and felt so free when I did.

Next morning he just texts me a LOOOOOOONG text talking about my "Strength" my "Smile" and all that weird stuff and that he misses me. to which I only replied "Thanks."

And he has been texting me here and there asking how I am doing and that he misses me and I'm really just being nice replying to his texts with short convo ending responses. I think now I should really just cut him off cuz nonsense has gone way too far and it's best to block his ass cuz I have enough on my plate and too many crazy people in my life...

Oh btw, the next night I met someone else and arranged with them for a nightstand so I was just fucking him while watching "300"
THAT SHIT WAS EPIC. LOL
#2
Go with your gut on that, block him on your phone and any apps. You could even give him a short, I'm sorry, don't think it'll work, to much drama, blah, blah, blah.
Those who have HATE in their heart are HATEFUL PEOPLE
#3
Sounds like he overly internalizes things, assumes everything is some sort of sign and lets it drive him mad...

Either way sounds like you made the right choice... you can't fix people, that's one thing I have learned. Hopefully he will grow out of all that or can't find someone he is more compatible with, sounds like a nice guy just bad chemistry.
#4
kindy64 Wrote:Go with your gut on that, block him on your phone and any apps. You could even give him a short, I'm sorry, don't think it'll work, to much drama, blah, blah, blah.

Yep, do that if needed, no sense of being pestered... I've exercised my blocking powers a time or two...
#5
Yeah, I don't understand not blocking someone you don't want contact with.

A girl friend of my fiance brought over a friend of hers who was breaking up with her abusive boyfriend. I couldn't f'in stand it. The two of them were huddled over their phones, texting this guy saying what a shithead he was or what not. Then calling him.

I went upstairs where my boyfriend was getting ready with another of his girl friends. I guess I had "a look" since he asked what was wrong. Told him the two of them sounded like high schoolers and I didn't need to be around the drama. Guess someone told them cause they left soon after.

If you don't need to contact someone (like my ex-wife and I still have a son we co-parent) then block them after you tell them it's over. Seems simple to me.
Those who have HATE in their heart are HATEFUL PEOPLE
#6
It's time to stop replying to his texts. Due to his emotional imbalance, and what sounds like might be some sort of attachment disorder, you need to cut off contact or he will never actually move on. He'll just keep clinging to ANYTHING you reply as a reason to keep trying.
[Image: Signature500.jpg][Image: Signature502.jpg]
#7
TwisttheLeaf Wrote:It's time to stop replying to his texts. Due to his emotional imbalance, and what sounds like might be some sort of attachment disorder, you need to cut off contact or he will never actually move on. He'll just keep clinging to ANYTHING you reply as a reason to keep trying.

I'm literally just being nice u guys cuz of what we had. But if that's what should be. So be it! I'll block him !!
#8
kindy64 Wrote:Yeah, I don't understand not blocking someone you don't want contact with.

A girl friend of my fiance brought over a friend of hers who was breaking up with her abusive boyfriend. I couldn't f'in stand it. The two of them were huddled over their phones, texting this guy saying what a shithead he was or what not. Then calling him.

I went upstairs where my boyfriend was getting ready with another of his girl friends. I guess I had "a look" since he asked what was wrong. Told him the two of them sounded like high schoolers and I didn't need to be around the drama. Guess someone told them cause they left soon after.

If you don't need to contact someone (like my ex-wife and I still have a son we co-parent) then block them after you tell them it's over. Seems simple to me.

Thank you for sharing that story. when I was young I thought adults were mature enough to understand life and take responsibility for their life and actions but I only grew up to find out that they're just a bunch of children trapped inside of adult bodies... Is it so hard to grow the fuck up and be sane?? Jesus!
#9
Being nice all the time can wear you down. I've been there, tried that, being nice for me seldom gets me far... That being said I do find it easier to be nice than to be mean -- well until someone pisses me off and then I can be pretty ruthless but I don't like being angry.
#10
Good luck, [MENTION=21000]verysimple[/MENTION]. It sounds as if you have got your shit together, at least.
Bighug


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