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Think I came on too strong, what next?
#1
Hi Smile basically I was texting a guy for a few weeks and we arranged to meet. The first date went really well and we hit it off and the next day we met again. We then arranged to meet a couple of days later. Now the following day I asked him if he wanted to go to the cinema when we met and he didn't reply. I texted a couple more times and then rang about an hour before we'd said we would meet and heard nothing.
That night he finally got back to me and said he was very sorry etc, he then said that he was beginning to feel unsure about getting back into a relationship and maybe in a few weeks he'd feel differently. At this point I got a bit gushy and said that I understood but I also really liked him and that he made me happy and I'd basically got my hopes up etc. What's also confusing is that the two dates we went it he seemed really happy and said he felt tingly when we kissed and all that cheesy stuff!

About a week has passed and now I'm really resisting the urge to text him and say sorry for coming on too strong, when I was with him I keep trying to arrange to meet again and then when he said about feeling unsure I got so gushy! In hindsight these were really bad things to do to a guy who was unsure in the first place! Do you think I have anything to loose by texting him now saying this? Or else I'm thinking of waiting a couple of weeks to give him space and then contact him.
Any advice would be really appreciated! I'm new to this!

This was the first time I'd ever been on a date with a guy I really fancied and I think i messed it up, I really want to fix it!!
#2
I wouldn't apologize, dont want him thinking your a pushover and that is one less text your sending to him. Best to ignore him, let him make the next move on his own time.
"When you think all is forsaken,
Listen to me now
You need never feel broken again
Sometimes darkness can show you the light
" ~Disturbed
#3
SilverBullet Wrote:I wouldn't apologize, dont want him thinking your a pushover and that is one less text your sending to him. Best to ignore him, let him make the next move on his own time.

Agree wait a few weeks. But I would text him say in a months time. But it would be better if he texted you.
[Image: giphy.gif]
#4
artyboy Wrote:Agree wait a few weeks. But I would text him say in a months time. But it would be better if he texted you.

A month's time? Sorry but if someone thinks they're going to keep me on the hook for a month, guess again. I get it, a week or so but a month is insane.
[MENTION=24063]Grobo[/MENTION] Sometimes we can create our own problems by liking someone a little too much in the beginning. Do necessarily think of a date being a direct path to a relationship, or sex for that matter...I mean it can be. Just play it cool. Let him come to you as [MENTION=19807]SilverBullet[/MENTION] suggested. I think that is also a good way to see if someone likes you enough or has the gall to talk to you. It's what I do, well now I do anyway. Once I feel that I'm beyond that halfway mark, I step back and see what the other person does. Saves me a lot of time, next bitch! Sheep However, I will admit it still hurts...angry, sad when someone I really like doesn't return the same. However, that's life.
#5
In your shoes, I would text him with a note asking him how he's doing, and that "you're sorry if he felt you were coming on too strong", ending with an "I hope to hear from you soon" (or something of the sort) to close it out.

Then? Wait and see if he replies over the course of the week. If he doesn't? It's time to move on.
[Image: Signature500.jpg][Image: Signature502.jpg]
#6
Thanks for your advice so far. I've written a text that basically says that I'm sorry for coming on too strong and for putting pressure on him. And also that I think it's because it was all so new to me.
I'm still unsure about whether to send it though. I just want to get it right this time. The one thing holding me back is that he said he'd maybe be ready in a few weeks. I don't want him to think that I'm rushing him by sending this message. But at the same time I want to apologise so he knows I won't be like how I was again. And I know that until I send it I won't be able to think about anything else!
My head is all over the place!
#7
Wait a week until you send the text just to see if he contacts you. I wouldn't apologize though as I don't think you have done anything wrong.
An eye for an eye
#8
Dan1980 Wrote:Wait a week until you send the text just to see if he contacts you. I wouldn't apologize though as I don't think you have done anything wrong.

It's already been a week since we spoke last, do you mean wait another week?
#9
Grobo Wrote:It's already been a week since we spoke last, do you mean wait another week?

Why don't you wait until Friday night to send the text. That gives you two days which he may contact you. If he doesn't reply to the text then phone him.
An eye for an eye
#10
Ok thanks I might wait until Friday, it's literally contantly on my mind though so I'm very tempted to just do it tonight and see what happens! I just really don't want to mess up. I guess part of me is worried he'll not make the first move again because of how I was the first time. And at least if he knows I'm sorry and recognise that I messed up he might give me another chance


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