Homosexuality In America,” -- or-- How I found out I was “gay” at age 16, 1964.

[MikeW]

So here I am minding my own business and suddenly being confronted with a two-page black and white spread announcing in a BIG BOLD HEADLINE for the whole world to see that HOMOSEXUALS exist! For me it was a total OMFG WTF moment. My heart started racing with fear. I turned all shades of red with embarrassment, and began to break out in a cold sweat. Holy crap! This magazine was going to be seen by *my parents*! :eek:

But of course, as terrified as I felt -- as if I, personally, was being outed before the whole world right then and there -- I was also curious as hell. THIS was going to be one interesting read! It was a huge long article, too. Actually two separate articles. But I also knew the last thing I wanted was for *anyone* to see me reading this. I was “freaking out” (a phrase we hadn’t begun using yet) but had to put it aside until both my parents were out of the house. I was just going to pretend I didn’t see this or could care less.

When my parents were gone I began reading. I’m not going to copy and paste the whole thing into this thread. If you want to read it, there is a large PDF (28MB) file of it at this link: HOMOSECUALITY IN AMERICA. There’s also a less readable but easily browsable picture version of it HERE.

However, I do want to share some of the text in thread because it shows how “we” were thought about at that time and presented to the world and one another.

I’ll start by quoting the first few paragraphs seen above, the introduction to the article. My commentary is in red, the bolded text is to point out the prevailing social *attitude* about homosexuals. Underlining is just added emphasis . . .

These brawny young men in their leather caps, shirts, jackets and pants are practicing homosexuals, men who turn to other men for affection and sexual satisfaction. They are part of what they call the “gay world” (This was the first time I’d seen the word “gay” used to refer to sexuality), which is actually a sad and often sordid world. On these pages, LIFE reports on homosexuality in America, on its locale and habits (pp. 66-74) and sums up (pp.76-80) what science knows and seeks to know about it.

Homosexuality shears across the spectrum of American life -- the professions, the arts, business and labor. It always has. But today, especially in the big cities, homosexuals are discarding their furtive ways and openly admitting, even flaunting, their deviation. Homosexuals have their own drinking places, their special assignation streets, even their own organizations. And for every obvious homosexual, there are probably nine nearly impossible to detect (!!! Oh really?!!! :eek: ). This social disorder, which society tries to suppress, has forced itself into the public eye because it does present a problem -- and parents especially are concerned. The myth and misconception with which homosexuality has so long been clothed must be cleared away, not to condone it but to cope with it.

So, there you have the gist of it in the first two paragraphs. Homosexuality is a “furtive” “sad” and “sordid” world; a life style that is “a problem” that society must not “condone” but “cope with”. And of course parents are rightfully “concerned” about it.

To me this was terrifying and, at the same time, a true revelation. Up to this moment, I had NO IDEA there *were* other homosexuals -- well, at least not SO MANY -- that they had their own ‘world’, their own bars and such. For sure I knew other “queers” existed but to me all that was rather vague. As for my parents, now *there* was a truly horrifying thought. I’d never heard my parents mention anything about this, ever. If they knew about it at all, it certainly wasn’t something they felt comfortable speaking about. Of course they didn’t. It was all very shameful, very disturbing. Hell my parents hadn’t really said anything about sex to me *at all*. My mom said something to the effect that I needed to “be careful” and “wear protection” so as to not either get a girl pregnant or get a “social disease” (aka an STD). But none of this had come from my dad -- with whom I had a very strained relationship. Coming from my mom it was SO embarrassing, not to mention, to my mind *unnecessary*!! Getting a girl pregnant was the last thing she needed to worry about with me. I mean, come on mom, GET A CLUE ALREADY! LOL!!!

When I turned the page from this huge, dark, interior photo of a leather bar in San Francisco -- an image that, to me, was both scary and tantalizing ( @ WolfEyes ), I was met with a LOT more text to read and some interesting photographs.

One of them that I fond particularly interesting was the back of this young man sitting on a rail (bottom left):

[img] http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y204/Th...ure3-1.png[/img]

The caption below it read. . .

A homosexual sits on a rail in Los Angeles’ Pershig Square, where homosexuals new in town make contacts. A few who frequent it are male prostitutes but most just seek company.

What stuck me about this photograph, and the full page photo on the opposite page . . .



was that there was nothing particularly “unusual” about the guys. The one sitting on the rail looked like he was near my age. I couldn’t see his face but he might be cute! I had a pair of white Levis just like the ones he was wearing! As for the two guys shown from the back on the opposite page, I really couldn’t tell. Was the one on the right a girl in pants or just a guy with long wavy black hair piled on his head? Hell if I knew. But as for the guy in the sweater, that could just as well have been me, or most anyone I knew.

This was fascinating. On one hand it was painting this picture of this “problem” of a dark “sordid” but enticing world. But at the same time, as I read, it was telling US such things as how we dressed and where we could find one another . . .

In New York City, swarms of young, college-age homosexuals wearing tight pants, baggy sweaters and sneakers cluster in ragged phalanx along Greenwich Avenue in the Village. By their numbers and the casual attitude they are saying that the street -- and the hour -- is theirs. Farther uptown, in the block west of Times Square on 42nd Street, their tough-looking counterparts, dressed in dirty jackets and denims, loiter in front of the cheap movie theaters and sleezy bookstores. Few of the passers-by recognize them as male hustlers . . .

The article goes on to describe attire and locations in Chicago and Hollywood, and then continues . . .

Homosexuality -- and the problem it poses -- exists all over the U.S. but is most evident in New York, Chicago, Los Angeles, San Francisco, New Orleans and Miami. These large cities offer established homosexual societies to join, plenty of opportunity to meet other homosexuals on the streets, in bars or at parties in private homes, and, for those who seek it, complete anonymity. Here tolerance, even acceptance by the “straight” world, is more prevalent than in smaller communities. Where the “gay” world flourishes and presents so many social compensations, even the persistent pressure of antihomosexual police operations can be endured. Also, in the big cities, those professions favored by homosexuals -- interior decorating, fashion, design, hair-styling, the dance and theatre -- provide the most numerous job opportunities.

So, to me, this was f**king amazing! OMFG, you mean there are tens of thousands of “gay” guys like myself living in big cities!?

On the one hand the article was put forward as a kind of “shocking exposé” on the subject -- YET AT THE SAME TIME -- it was telling ALL of us, including dumb teenagers like me where we were, how we dressed, how we could find one another -- even what we were most likely to do for a living! :eek:

Homosexuals can find some or all of these advantages in many parts of the U.S. but, because of its reputation for easy hospitality, California has a special appeal for them. In the city of San Francisco, which rates as the “gay capital,” there are more than 30 bars that cater exclusively to a homosexual clientele. The number of these bars changes from week to week as periodic police drives close them down (their life expectancy is about 18 months). Some bars, like the Jumpin’ Frog, are “cruising” (pickup) bars, filled with coatless young men in tight khaki pants. They spend the evening standing around (there are few seats in “cruising” bars), drinking inexpensive beer and waiting. As each new customer walks into the dimly lit room he will lock eyes with a half dozen young men before reaching his place at the bar. Throughout the evening there is a constant turnover of customers as contacts are made and two men slip out together, or individuals move on to other bars in search of better luck. As closing time -- 2 a.m. -- approaches, the atmosphere grows perceptibly more tense. It is the “frantic hour,” the now-or-never time for making a contact.

This whole article was a f**ing trip! (Yet another slang term that wouldn’t become popular for another few years.). Yeah, on one hand, we’re being told that we can get arrested for being gay -- scary thought -- but on the other hand it is telling us where we are, how we find one another, what we look like, some of the slang we use, what to expect in a “gay bar,” even describing different kinds of gay bars and ‘scenes’ -- everything from piano lounges to S & M clubs. There were even gay magazines! And, as you can see, in this regard things weren’t all *that* different from the way they are today. The whole ‘butch / fem’ debate was going on even back then. The thing is, NO ONE KNEW ABOUT ANY OF IT.

Up to the publication of this article all of this was simply UNKNOWN to most people -- even other “gay” people. Up to this point, I didn’t even know “gay” meant anything other than ‘care free’ and ‘happy’! For sure, if you were living in a big city like SF or LA or NYC you might know, especially if you were gay or a hustler or a John. But for everyone else outside those realms, all this was a startling, even shocking, eye-opening revelation! For me this was like “how to be -- and what it means to be -- gay 101”!

To be continued . . .