What's on Your Mind

[Emiliano]

But anger is so goooooooooood.

Not really, it gets you tired, drained, unhealthy. You can never win with anger. Even when it's the most justified kind of anger ever, it still does you more harm than anything else.

Outlets, Emil. You are far too polite sometimes, far too compromising, or so I see. Not bad of course, more people should be like that. But not all the time. Sometimes you get to rant and yell and punch the fucking wall till your fist is bleeding. Sometimes, not including outright violence and other illegalities like murder, you get to release that anger on someone who deserves it.

You deserve to be heard even when people won't like what they hear.



That definitely sounds better than what I had in mind when reading that word smh.

I'm exhausted by my anger lately, and venting doesn't make me feel better because it does nothing to change the things that I'm so angry about. And seeing others who are not angry make me angrier.

I do many positive, constructive things in my life, I act and am viewed as a role model often in my life, so I can be happy that I contribute directly to my communities and the next generation. And to some extent that is all I can do. But I feel powerless to broaden my contributions.

I never thought of myself as being an idealist or naive, but I do believe that I have always searched for the good in people, to understand their perspective and to have empathy for people who I don't agree with, that I have a responsibility to try to understand what makes them come to their opinions.

But I feel that ability in myself is slipping and I'm becoming very cold to the viewpoints of people I don't agree with. I am very much narrowing the scope of people I care about and respect, and that in itself bothers me. I don't have the energy to be "the better person" or to reach across the aisle so to speak. I feel myself radicalizing and switching from a world view of diplomacy and compromise to one of confrontation.

That's not a trait a value in others, much less in myself.


Coquito helps.